colour my world with crayons!

2010-03-15T01:14:00.003+08:00

hur. i've been lazy, slacking off on fyp and leaving qiudong to do most of the stuff!
SORRY! i will get my act up together!

i hate it when i go through a phase of self inquiring.
i think that thinking is tiring.
see, i am thinking again! -.-

God, what am i supposed to do?
be the light that lights my path, O'Lord.

2010-02-02T17:04:00.001+08:00

I CAN BLOG AND FB STATUS UPDATE NON STOP ABOUT THE ANGEL VS THE DEVIL!

omg. the guy suddenly grew wings and halo. the bitch grew horns and a tail!

2010-02-02T13:49:00.003+08:00

where has my sense of things gone to.

this is depressing.

and, people always say every cents count. does it really? why are we starting to label by how much we put in?

since when has it become an I thing? you selfish, self centred person.

God has been awesome, He has provided in abundance. so, isn't it time to repay? and time to spread your love?

guess, somethings are not meant to be taught by meant to come from yourself. i can't teach you sympathy nor can i teach you generosity.

in any case.

GOD IS AWESOME

2010-01-26T23:45:00.000+08:00

God says to celebrate life and to praise myself!

HAHAHAHA.

hmmm. (:

GOD BLESS.
fyi, i think God is AWESOME.

2010-01-18T21:56:00.001+08:00

despair.

2009-12-22T12:11:00.002+08:00

hearing about diseases, deaths, impending doom and all the big hoo-haa regarding 2012 got me thinking.

what do i want to achieve in this short lifetime of mine?

and if like what jannah's mum said, during the second coming of Christ, only one of each pair will be chosen to go up to Heavens to be with God, will we get chosen? or will our faith be tested?

getting into mbio was like getting a step closer to my dreams, hopes and aspiration. but being in it, makes me wonder, is all this needed to save a life? or is there an easier alternative to it? being in a life science course does not make me throw behind my one whole long line or used-to-be aspiration, but in fact it made me think, and contemplate if i should have chosen the other paths, would life be easier for me? but, choosing the other alternatives would it forfeit my true desire to do biology?

God said to not doubt in my true desire, but to learn to trust in it.

and trust it shall be. (:

fragility of life is so true. i could be here typing this today, but would i be tomorrow?

there are many if-only and many if-we-knew in this world.

but if we really knew, there would be no surprises in this world, we would be stuck in that little greenhouse of ours, never knowing how to step out and grow up.

so, today is the day that God have made. live it out, like there's no tomorrow.

like what steve jobs said, stay hungry; stay foolish.

GOD BLESS!

2009-12-21T15:21:00.003+08:00

finallyyyyyyy.

holidays are here! (: but it doesn't feel like it! T_T

stuck at the shop alone with martin goneeee. no one to talk cock sing song to. D: rawr.
the lincoln brewster song is stuck in my head!

Here we go!
Oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh

I’m casting my cares aside
I’m leaving my past behind
I’m setting my heart and mind on You
Jesus

I’m reaching my hand to Yours
Believing there’s so much more
Knowing that all You have in store for me is good
Is good

Chorus:
Today is the day You have made I will rejoice and be glad in it
Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
And I won’t worry about tomorrow
I’m trusting in what You say
Today is the day
Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh
Today is the day
Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh

I putting my fears aside
I’m leaving my doubts behind
I’m giving my hopes and dreams to You
Jesus
I’m reaching my hand to Yours
Believing there’s so much more
Knowing that all You have in store for me is good
Is good

Chorus:

(Guitar interlude)

(2x’s)
I will stand upon Your truth.
(I will stand upon Your truth)
And all my days I’ll live for You
(And all my days I’ll live for You)

Chorus:

TODAY IS THE DAY PEOPLE.:D

for God reigns and all praise to Him. (:

the after feeling of each CT papers seems to escalate as i complete each paper. lol.

i seriously love mobio, but its not cause of dr choy please. T_T
my gosh.

i need a new phone, desperately.
and i need to see dr tan, desperately too.
my cough is killing me.
and, what if i get meningitis!
D:
my oh my.

christmas is coming, my wish is going to be a new phone!
:D
after christmas is trial camp.
-.- i need a rest.

and, i want the new casting crowns new cd!

oh btw, the latest macbook design sucks! :D
which means, i have the prettiest WHITE macbook! (:
macboooooooooook. (:

life has been pretty interesting, first time, i enjoy studying for common test! (:

cute much? lol!
okay, i am just filling this dusty space with worthless stuff. lol.

GOD BLESS EVERYONE! (:

2009-11-10T00:22:00.003+08:00

Genesis 1:26 (New International Version)

²⁶ Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, ^a]">[a] and over all the creatures that move along the ground."

as i look upon this verse, it once again reminded me that we are made in God's image. we are made pure, holy and loving. all the qualities that God possesses, we do have them too. many will ask, if so, why is it that humans are imperfect, we are plagued with imperfections. the answer is simple, we are not made to be robots. God love us so much that He gave us a brain to think for ourselves. so, how you are is the result of the path you chose to tread on.

it becomes obvious to me that, i am living among people who have chosen the wrong path, they have chosen to walk on the path of destruction, the path which leads them to only one final destination if they do not turn back and start walking towards the light instead of grappling around in the dark. the destination they are currently headed to is, HELL.

living in such conditions, it does not mean that i have to bend towards that sort of behaviour. i remember pastor phil saying once that a fish may live in salty waters but they are definitely not salty. we have the ability to choose the way we want to go, we do not have to conform to our environments. we have our freedom to choose. this is what God is for, God is there to guide us on the narrow path which leads to Heaven. no one said the walk to heaven was going to be easy, but with God around, everything will be fine.

having said so much, it just serves as a reminder to me that i have to pray for salvation for the people whom i detest and dislike, for it is not the holy and righteous that Jesus had died for, Jesus died for the sinners. since we are made in God's image, shouldn't we act like how Jesus would act? we are only as good as our words, and our words define us as who we are. and God's Words are commandents for us.

having chosen this walk of faith, i will not give up, but i will endure on, living the life the way it should be.

knowing that having people who are just aimless in their lives, doing nothing but create trouble, though it may be tiring and draining to be cleaning after them and taking their shit, but if Jesus didn't complain, i should learn to not complain too. (:

bear with me. though i am whining most of the time about THEM. but i am trying to be more forgiving and benevolent towards THEM.

S&S tmr.

ALL THE BEST TO ALL GLS!

GOD BLESS

2009-10-26T22:16:00.004+08:00

as i sat down in serenity, thoughts came flowing back to me. memories, memories of the gl life especially came back to me like it was just yesterday i was a gl.

back then i didn't truly understand what it meant by, this is our year.
honestly, i didn't come to cherish all that we've done together as gls till i've moved on to be a sgl.
the feelings were different, the things that we have to do is different.
the mood for every training is different.
the gls have it rough during training, we as sgls have it even rougher.
as a gl, we can be carefree, not needing to care about what's going to happen tomorrow at training, not needing to worry if this is suitable, that is suitable.
the type of efforts put in is definitely different.
back then, it was just a matter of do i want to go for training today, right now, it is, i MUST and i NEED to go for training today.
it became a responsibility, it is not an unpleasant responsibility, yes, i do relish the feeling of having to be responsible at times, but the mood is different.
there are many more things we have to watch out for, many more things to control.
being a gl is a privilege that you get to enjoy only for 1 year.
the time passes really quickly when you are a gl, the bonds you formed during FOC is the strongest.
having been through pre-FOC, FOC and post-FOC, you will feel a sense of satisfaction, you will know deep down in your heart, this is all that you have worked for, a family that is not related by blood but yet that closely bonded.
you will know it is all worth it, it is all for a good cause.

the days leading up to FOC contains of memories kept in your heart in that special place where you know you'll never forget, the hectic schedule, it felt like we practically lived in school, the rehearsals, the meetings, the many things to be done for your group.
the laughter, the tears, the joy, the sadness, the sweat it will all taste sweet in your heart and mind.

during FOC, the craziness, the excitement that filled us was a little too much for me to handle but yet warming. it warms your heart to see your batch come together as one and work things out. no mountains too high to scale, no oceans too deep to swim with the support of your batch. at the end of the camp, you will feel like everything had happened too quickly and too hard to fully grasp it. it is only till you finally settle down and tell yourself that it is all over that you start to miss it terribly already. be given a chance, i'd like to go through FOC once again, but this is not our year, it is the GLs 09/10 year.

our FOC days will be remembered forever.

school has started, yet again another same ol' same ol' resolution was made, that was to put in more effort to study. but whether can it be done remains to be another different story.

am glad that i'm once again in the church going mood! :D
let this fire not die in me once again, Jesus.

:D

alrighttttttt.
GOD BLESS (:

2009-10-08T11:02:00.002+08:00

helloooooooooooooooooooooos :D

finally i can feel a slight tinge of the holiday mood! (:

many birthdays are coming up D:

i'm been doing nothing much except to rape the internet of hong kong dramas and english movies!
sounds exciting don't it! :D

haha.
oh well.

i'm just bored.

GOD BLESS

2009-09-29T01:35:00.006+08:00

Faith is not necessary when you know how things are going to work out, - that's knowledge. It's in the time of unknowing that having faith is what sees you through to the other side. Faith is what gives you strength. Faith is that light in your heart that keeps on shining even when it's all darkness outside. Now is the time to keep that faith alive!

hmmm. what perfect timing, just as i was starting to once again gather up and faith and learn to trust in the Lord.

its the uncertainties in life that reqiures faith to bring us through it. so my friend, do not think of why you are doing so much, think of it as a test of your faith. though in the process you might get yourself hurt, and no doubt do spare a thought for yourself, but test yourself on your faith. do you really have the faith to carry on. do you really have the faith to keep sacrificing, to keep giving all you can. for the Bible says that

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (New International Version)

⁴Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

so, do give it some thought. (:

no worries, i'll be here.

pastor kong really shared a really good and insightful word on sunday service, which set me thinking.
You are only as good as your word.
Like God, like us.
hmm.

the service was all about staying true to your promises. who are you when you do not keep to your word.

oh well. my brain is too tired to function at this hour and i am detesting this feeling of being unable to translate what's in my mind into words on this pathetic blog.

having watched angus, thongs and perfect snogging, once again reaffirmed my love for the british accent in the spoken english. how charming and delightful is thy sound of the accent to thy ears. :D
OH WELL.

quote of the day with joshua:

There is a beautiful in every ugly, but i certainly do not see a beautiful in THIS ugly!

HAHAHAHAH. :D

till when i am in a better mood for blogging which goes back to the point, since when am i ever in the right mood for it?

GOD BLESS. (:

2009-09-20T23:16:00.002+08:00

back from bintan! (:

PISCES OI!
(:

well well.
not in a right mood to blog.
am utterly tired and i can still feel the ferry rocking vigorously at the tanah merah ferry terminal.
HAHA.

well definitely enjoyed the WONDERFUL TIMES SPENT WITH MY DEAREST SGLS AND GLS!
:D

well.
sgls 09/10 are always loveeeeeeeeeeee. :D
and so are the gls 09/10 :D

bonding was seen throughout the camp, which is a superb thing (:

survivor island was a great once a lifetime experience!
i've never tried not bathing for an entire day and slept in my dirty clothes.
HAHA.
well, i didn't really have to "survive" on the island.
lol.
to think i was whining before camp that i would not be able to eat well for 3 days.
HAHAHAHA.

kayaking was really FUN FUN FUN though tiring.
boom netting was something really new and AWESOME.
:D

there was more than the camp activities that i've experienced in bintan.
all along the different bus rides, we could see the locals there smiling so happily and waving at us.
which leads me to think how much God loves me to allow me to be born and bred in singapore.
the locals are not as well off as us singaporeans, they do not live in houses as well built and comfy like ours but yet they are so much more friendly and humble than us. so why is it that the money that we have make us in such arrogant and unfriendly creatures?

oh well.

i am sleepy now. HAHA.

GOD BLESS

2009-09-11T00:14:00.002+08:00

HELLOOOOOOOS!

i'm here! (:

i'm updating cause vanessa told me to do so.
please do feel honoured, SASA!

hahahaha.

well i know that i've always said that life's been a monotony.
yeah it is, it is always, work, training, work, training.
it even seemed like my sundays are no longer sabbath sunday where i do nothing but head to church and just worship God and bask in His Love and Glory.

where did my holidays run to?
HELLOOOOOOOO, COME BACK TO ME YOU CURSED HOLIDAY.

my oh my.
i was darn late for training on wednesday!
D:
sorry guyssss.

right now, i'm still having cramps from laughing too much on the bus and at burger king at holland v.
but i'm not having the worse case scenario, joel see actually laughed till he cried.
and cailing was holding back her laughter in fear of tearing her stitches.

dinner was just fine, watching the guys gobble down 3, 4 bowls of porridge is freaky. really. even my dad don't take that much porridge.

my o level cert can pwn someone, so says joshua yeo.
no worries bro, your o level cert can pwn him too as much as your results are suckyyyyyyyy. HAHAHA. :D

i need a movie break! D:
oh man, i guess the plans for gamer is actually busted. HUR.

i'm tired from proposal vetting. HAHA.

till another time.

GOD BLESS

2009-08-29T23:39:00.002+08:00

hahaha.
earth to earth, dust to dust.

okay, holidays here but dang it i do not feel the festive mood.
oh well.
batam in another 8 hours time but i am not looking forward to it.
i mean, what can i buy there?
ralph lauren and what else?

i have a bad premonition about ccta.

anyway, academic matter aside.
now that the holidays here, there is nothing much for me to do except to report for work everyday (wednesdays being an exception due to training) at pacific plaza.
i feel underpaid. ):

final destination 4 in 3d was rather cool.
had a great time laughing at those people die in a sadistic way. :D
too bad, i've always been this sadistic.
and yes yes, the next movie outing with joel, kh, jere, cl, alee is on 10 september, gamer.
just before joel's enlistment.
AINT YOU HAPPY.

i feel terrible about missing church service AGAIN.
it feels like forever since i've been to church and bask in the glory of God.
RAWR.

shall watch my king of snooker then time to snooze in time to wake up for the trip.
even though i would rather stay in singapore and spend time with that bugger, but oh well, shall make the best out of the trip.

comparing arms muscles with my mum and dad is super funny.
oh man.
my dad, a weightlifter? nah, a chopsticks lifter more likely.
SUPER GLUTTON.
:D
now you know, where i get my genes from.
(:

GOD BLESS

2009-08-23T19:39:00.002+08:00

life's been a blur of events.
honestly till yesterday, i didn't even realised that august is coming to an end.
the days seemed all slurred together not being able to differentiate them apart.

missed aqua paper ytd.
microbio's tmr.

but i'm losing the motivation to study.
i feel so uninterested in this entire course other than the biology modules.
hell to ccta, hell to math, hell to the boring aqua theory.

i feel so out of touched.
its as if once again my life has been encapsulated.
it lacks excitement, it lacks vigor.

i need my messiah.

GOD BLESS

2009-08-18T23:59:00.002+08:00

GAWD.

life sucks.

i have not been studying.
the mood isn't there, which leads back to the main point, since when do i ever have it?
probably a slight stint just before o's.
rofl.

in the morning woke up and vomited the disgusting and super acidic gastric juice which my throat made a parasympathetic action and accidentally swallowed a little inwards and burned my own throat causing me to have blood in my sputum, unknowing creatures would have thought i've contracted the infamous tuberculosis.

i really need to lin shi bao YE SHU jiao.
HAHAHA.

crap.

i need to concentrate!
ugh.

GOD BLESS ME

GOD BLESS

2009-08-09T00:16:00.004+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE! :D

haha. josiah's 21st is coming up real soon.
you gave me an idea for your present. :D

HAHAHA. as you wanted. blackberry storm. well, it can be readily found in carrefour and relatively cheap which makes it a good deal for me to buy. (:

HAHA. and your other wish which may come through in 2013 for its just a concept watch. it is even cheaper or me to print it out and give it to you now!
probably i will really use the tag heuer box i have at home and put the picture in and write to be filled in on 10 august 2013.
HAHAHAHA.

and i'm serious y'know. i've yet to get anything. i have totally zero idea of what to get.

OH.
NUR IS GETTING MARRIED TMR!
HAHAHA. (:

which means i'm gonna have to give church a miss. ):
oh well.

GOD BLESS SINGAPORE.

2009-08-07T22:32:00.003+08:00

helloooooooos (:

life's been pretty much of a bore.
decided to totally give the ccta quiz a miss after the tragic cct yesterday.
yeah i know, its dumb so sue me.

TESTS AND QUIZZES ARE JUST BEING AN ASSHOLE TO ME.
dr new failed me and bingxin for a stupid reason. WTH.

this whole thing is probably just being a bitch to me.
why is it that some people find it so hard to open their damn mouth to just communicate and talk it through. maybe the flu bug got to them and made them mute for some reason or so.

SGLS PICNIC! :D
LSCT SOCIETY IS LOVE. (:

i detest the fact that i find it hard to express what i want to say.

omg. VANS VANS VANS VANS VANS.
vanessa when are we ordering our shoes D:

i miss church. ):

someone's turning 21 soon. (:

GOD BLESS

2009-08-02T19:28:00.002+08:00

HELLO :D

osim triathlon was funnnnn.
though tiring.
we were so tired that me, jamie, jannah, sally just lain on the pavement and slept causing curious stares towards us. and an uncle even commented, wha they like that also can sleep ah?

the triathletes are really worth my salute!
their perseverance is really awesome, something which i can never achieve.

this entire event though i whined a lot, but i managed to learn many different lessons which i am too tired to blog out now. :D

thonning at macs was great fun!
with the truth or double truth.
so now we know some dirty secrets.
:D
HAHAHAHA.

GOD BLESS (:

2009-08-01T00:50:00.001+08:00

HAHAHA.

POOR GERALD.
joke.
gerald. nearly got a heart attack 5 minutes ago, when his assignment was due. says:
*OMG, RENEE, YOU KNOW MY CCTA WIKI RIGHT, OMG WHEN I SUBMITTED IT AT 11:55, MY INTERNET DIED.
*OMG I PANICKED.
*AND WHEN I CONNECTED AGAIN IT WAS GONEEEEE.
*I NEVER TYPED SO FAST IN MY LIFEEEE
*I TYPED OUT MY WIKI IN 7 MINUTES
*OMG.

as usual, ccta was being a bitch to all of us.

me and bx stressed over the damn report at emart with tan hong kiat missing! D:
DAMN.

but, we managed to churn out a magnificient piece of work!
well, its magnificient to me, but i wonder is it the same for susan lee?
ROFL.

life's been a blur recently with so many things to be done.
HEAR ME ROAR.

shit, i've lost all motivation to blog.

something which joshua said really struck a chord in me.
"i do not need a festival to praise God, do i"
SO TRUE SO TRUE.

okay fine, i shall go bum around.
life's too short to be so hard on yourself!
:D

and people who mugs a lot sends a shiver down my spine okay!
and i have my reservations about them!
ROFL.

oh well.

GOD BLESS

2009-07-27T23:33:00.000+08:00

HELLO WORLD

i feel so bad for myself that i can't seem to stay away away from the mystiques of my computer. i am so bloody tempted to watch the guardian!

anyway, out with mousey today :D
i love mouse forever ever ever ever!
HAHAHA.

hmmm.

why is it that time pulls people apart?
is it the shallowness of the relationship which the two people share that hinders the growth. or is it the fault of both parties who do not bother to keep up with each other's life. it's pathetic isn't it for good things to always come to an end. it's a calling to reality to wake up from the picture perfect dream where you live in happily ever after. or maybe it's time telling you to let go, to forget and move on in your own life. there will always be people who enter and exit, there will be people who disappear without a trace nor reason. this is just us humans. forgetful creatures aren't we? we tend to forget the old and see only the new. does it matter when one tries to put in an effort to keep going when the other is neglecting that effort made? it takes two hands to clap don't it?

maybe this is why we live and die, we come and go. nothing is for a lifetime.
except for the One above.

i've decided to watch it.
life's too short to waste it away.

hmmm.
should i volunteer?
D:

GOD BLESS

2009-07-26T23:13:00.002+08:00

HELLO HELLO :D

today pastor tan shared a great word of God!

the past few days have been just going by without much excitement.
there isn't the mood for anything.
even till now.

hmm.
well, but life hasn't been to bad to me for i managed to go to church and meet ben.
(:

and i certainly hope everything will be fine tmr cause i'll be meeting mousey. (:
and on wed, i'm having my mmb common test 2, thurs is my math cct, fri is the submission of my ccta wikis and the first night of FESTIVAL OF PRAISE. (:
but sad to say, the bands this year don't seem to excite me much unlike delirious? 2 years ago.
hmm. this is going to be a busy week which i am going to restrict myself on the daily indulgence.

mon : meeting mousey for daiso shopping, home to study for mmb.
tues : instructor meeting, study for mmb, practice on AT LEAST 10 questions of math.
wed : mmb ct2, training, math revision on formulas
thurs : math cct, ccta wiki to be done
fri : submission of wiki, self read on ccta notes.

well. its time to buck up and do better.
i am sick and tired of just passing my tests.

i want to be a living testimony!
i want to shine for You, Jesus.

maybe this is why everyone needs God.
its because this emptiness in me is not fillable by anyone but You, Lord.

find the need, meet the need
find the hurt, heal the hurt

my first love is You, God.

everything i am is for Your Kingdom's cause.

maybe i am tired of the sins in my life, i need deliverance.
i know FOP will strengthen my faith.

o'Lord.
bless baby ganelle.
heal her stage 4 cancer.
she is only 5, dear God.
she is Your child too, You breathed life into her.
let the cancer cells die.
God, perform Your miracle on her.
her earthly father is Your faithful servant, serving the church for 20 years already.
Lord, touch her and command the cancer cells to die, command the demon to leave.
i love You, Lord.
so does she.
hear our cries and hear her cries.
AMEN.

GOD BLESS

2009-07-23T22:10:00.001+08:00

GAWD.
my arms are still aching.
i can't type properly.
HUR.

anyw.
i think ccta project is screwed.
DAMN.

GOD SAVE ME!

HAHAHAHHAA.

GOD BLESS

2009-07-16T01:02:00.002+08:00

HELLO :D

hmmm. i do not know how many silent readers are there here.
but, just some thoughts of the day.

in a society/ community/ social circle etc with the system of hierachy, there will always be a particular few who are the ones being burdened with the responsibility for the actions of others, being the intermediate level between the people high up and connecting to those under. these people are the heros in their own way, providing a layer of protection and the bridge to those who are his/ her subaltern. they are the non-complaining ones, trying as much as they could to be the aegis, the guardian in their own very special way and the support for the rest. to these people, i salute them.

well, to be honest. i am in a rather bitchy mood during the night.
words that have been said can never be taken back.
let this serve as a reminder to me.
'tis time to grow up once again.

i am just very apologetic for the hurtful words that i've said or once said.

God let this serve as a reminder to me that the power of speech is to praise, to worship and to glorify Your name, to exalt You.
Jesus, teach me to be more Christ-like and to not so worldly.

hmmm.

i am still having difficulty trying to explain what i am feelings and my thoughts.
oh well.

GOD BLESS

2009-07-15T00:10:00.005+08:00

John 14:6 (New International Version)

⁶Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

suddenly, i felt this strong sense of God's love washing over me. (:

it just makes me feel like crying tears of joy.

BUT GOD SAVES THE DAY! (:

I LOVE YOU LORD.

GOD BLESS <3

2009-07-14T12:24:00.000+08:00

Renee got a message that on this day, God wants her to know...

... that God has an important purpose for you, and made everything possible for you to succeed.

That's not to say it's an easy purpose, or a convenient one. It might very well seem hard or even impossible, but it only looks that way. The truth is that one day you will look back and see how all the pieces fit together. And how your life has been a complete and utter success.

OH YEAH.
HALLEHLUJAH!
MUAHAHAHAHAHA.

aqua practical now!
HEH.
pbl today.
and we're all online.
ROFL.

GOD BLESS.

2009-07-13T22:42:00.002+08:00

:D

oh crap.
dr tan has yet to reply my sms!
hear me ROAR.

and, i'm happy now.
cause i ate TWO apples!
:D
one red and one granny smith.
HEH.
apples make me high!

i'm sleepy!
D:

but i haven't finish my research for my ccta proj.
DANGSSSS.
shall go do it!
(:

ben got enlisted today!
HAHAHA.
no more hair!
:D
aye, strangely.
both ben ong and i felt that ben tan would enjoy army.
especially the physical trainings.
ROFL.

alrighttyy.

GOD BLESS

2009-07-12T20:30:00.002+08:00

wheeeee (:

HELLO HELLO WORLD!

i feel so refreshed and re-energized in faith.
yes, i'm like an energizer bunny now, just that i'm not a bunny!
:D

pastor bernard shared such a great word on FAITH!
(alee, so sad that you're not here today to listen to this great word preached!)

FAITH = REASONED TRUST IN GOD!
Jesus was the word made flesh.
Jesus was all God and yet all Man.
Jesus carried the fullness of God, embodied.
Psalm 22
Jesus grew in 4 areas
Luke 2:52
1. Intellectually
2. Physically
3. Spiritually
4. Socially & Emotionally
Stir the heart, engage the will.
Hebrews 11:1
Faith is substance hoped for
substance - hupostatsis
(hupostasis : foundation & support)
The stronger you are in faith, the lesser evidence is needed to trust God.

alee, this is for you!
:D
anything, can just ask me! (:

BEN!
OCS IS WAITING FOR YOU!
HAHAHAHA.
you white UNICORN.
if you get kitkat in tekong, tell me okay!
ROFL.

alright.
shall go continue on my research for the ccta project.
(kill me please.)

GOD BLESS

2009-07-10T23:49:00.004+08:00

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

God, i am so blessed!
:D
thank You for the many many people You've placed in my life!

YAY.

2009-07-10T22:47:00.003+08:00

I SAW A SNAKE TODAY STUCK IN THE DRAIN!
D:
and cause the pest terminators (don't ask me why is it the pest terminators and not NEA) were trying very hard to pull the snake out, the snake was almost severed at one part.
AND, IT WAS AN EXPLODING SNAKE!
if you click on the photo to enlarge it, you will see that the snake was tied to a blue rope.
the terminators tied the rope to the van and tried using the motion force from the van to pull the snake out, and VOILA!
THE SNAKE EXPLODED!
poor snake!
HAHAHAHA.

YAY!
Rev. Dr. A.R Bernard weekend!
:D

and and and.
LSCT presents a new diploma next year!
VETERINARY BIOSCIENCE!
renwei, don't sad okay!
HAHAHA.

oh, and i bought transformers for ethan!
HAHAHA.
OPTIMUS PRIME!
:D

and, my applied micro linked with immunolgy project is done!
:D
YAY YAY YAY!

but!
there's CCTA proj to do completed as well.
zzz.
we have to build our very own bioreactors.

A bioreactor may refer to any device or system that supports a biologically active environment.[1] In one case, a bioreactor is a vessel in which is carried out a chemical process which involves organisms or biochemically active substances derived from such organisms. This process can either be aerobic or anaerobic. These bioreactors are commonly cylindrical, ranging in size from liters to cubic meters, and are often made of stainless steel.

A bioreactor may also refer to a device or system meant to grow cells or tissues in the context of cell culture. These devices are being developed for use in tissue engineering.

On the basis of mode of operation, a bioreactor may be classified as batch, fed batch or continuous (e.g. Continuous stirred-tank reactor model). An example of a continuous bioreactor is the chemostat.

Organisms growing in bioreactors may be suspended or immobilized. The simplest, where cells are immobilized, is a Petri dish with agar gel. Large scale immobilized cell bioreactors are:

moving media
packed bed
fibrous bed
membrane

DANGSSSSSSS.

i have a sudden urge to read merchant of venice!
ROFL.

and also, a craving for...

YUM!
i want to chocolate ones from bakerzin!
HUR.

and also a craving for DURIAN PANCAKE!
):
shall eat them tmr!
:D

ethan's housewarming tmr!
gonna warm the house!
HEH.

"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."
1 John 1:9

yup yup.
(:
we are all sinners and Jesus came to free us!
thank You, Lord!

GOD BLESS
<3

2009-07-10T10:08:00.003+08:00

dangssss.

i'm rotting at home, skipping ccta.
HUR.

i've not been to lessons for a week!!!
D:
cause i've got COUGH still.

gosh.
this is such a good season to skip school!
ROFL.

shall chiong my mmb proj now! (:
then head to school later for proj meeting!
HEH.

GOD BLESS

2009-07-09T22:46:00.002+08:00

i've been staring into my lappy's screen since 10pm and nothing has been registered.
the word entamoeba histolytica constantly runs through my mind.
but till now, the presentation is not done.
i am in half of a good mind to just give up and go to bed for i've had a rough evening.

Entamoeba histolytica is an anaerobic parasitic protozoan, part of the genus Entamoeba.^[1] Predominantly infecting humans and other primates, E. histolytica is estimated to infect about 50 million people worldwide. Many older textbooks state that 10% of the world population is infected, but these figures predate the recognition that at least 90% of these infections were due to a second species, E. dispar.^[2] Mammals such as dogs and cats can become infected transiently, but are not thought to contribute significantly to transmission.

as quoted from wikipedia.

it sounds like quite an interesting topic, but just too bad that it ain't making an effort to keep me interested.

UGH.

Lord, give me strength and wisdom to carry on.
teach me how to keep giving like You gave.
teach me Your ways and guide me along.

ugh. i can't read my info in peace!

GOD BLESS

2009-07-09T09:11:00.000+08:00

all morning, since i woke up i've been trying to form a sentence with the words ALTER EGO in it.
damn, but i just can't seem to come up with one.
oh well.

last night was joking with ben about doctors and mcs!
HAHAHA.
we realised that doctors now seem to love giving MCS A LOT without probing too much into what is wrong with your system.
ROFL.
they are even scared of patients who have friends who have contracted h1n1 (ben, i'm talking about you! :D)
hohoho.
this is such a great season to take mcs!
lol.

hmm.
should i volunteer for youth olympics.
i bet it'll be damn COOL.
:D

i want to sleep.
T_T

maybe i should.
HAHA.
NIGHTS EVERYONE!

FTW, I'M STILL HAVING COUGH.
ITS COUGH RENWEI, NOT SWINE FLU!
:D
but if i've h1n1, i'll pass to irfan!
CONVERT YO!
:D
just kiddingggg.

GOD BLESS us all.
LET US NOT GET SWINEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

:D

2009-07-09T00:52:00.003+08:00

HELLO WORLD :D
i'm back earlier than expected!

(:

hmmm. just wanted to blog that i finally got down to watching FIREPROOF today.
it's a superb show i would say.
definitely great for all couples out there!

thank You Lord for giving me a chance to watch it, to show me what You want to tell me.
i certainly do need You in my life. (:
most importantly, i love You.
You will forever and ever be my first Love. (:

Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.
Romans 13:10

We love because he first loved us.
1 John 4:19

"Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called."
1 Timothy 6:12

and alee, this verse is for you (:
hold on to your faith. keep it, and grow in it. (:
i will always be there. (:

let us both walk the walk and not just talk the talk. (:

my head's starting to clear.

now i'm starting to see and wonder.
why exactly did i think he was better?
i was wrong.
from the onset.
its very clear to me now.

you never stop being good enough.

if i hadn't said that you're a good guy.
you are.

if i hadn't told you i forgive you.
i have.

if i hadn't told you i love you.
i do.

got this quote from fireproof.
i think its damn sweet. (:
as long as you and i both know.
i'm contented enough (:

GOD BLESS

2009-07-06T01:59:00.002+08:00

some people truly have the capability to produce such lousy excuses, no, no way am i going to call it a reason for it hardly suffice as one.

hmmm.

time to brush up further on my english (:

nope, my world isn't ending.
why would my world end, when i have an Almight Father who loves me.

i'm never gonna wait.
(:

till then when i feel like blogging once again.

i am probably going to leave this space for a week to go through my emotions and thoughts.
but no worries.
i will be back.

i am just truly amazed at some's stupidity.

btw, josiah did a probability test on the gatchapon machine.
how COOL is that.
cause he got the character he wanted!
(:

till then when i return to shake off the dust.

thy hath fury that man doth want to incur.

2009-07-06T00:26:00.002+08:00

yessss.

THIS IS IT!

Renee got a message that on this day, God wants her to know...

... that every relationship rests on three legs: accepting, supporting and challenging.

That's really it, isn't it? You want your relationships to be grounded on accepting each other as you are. On supporting each other through the inevitable ups and downs. On challenging each other to become more, to grow, to flourish. Which one of these is the more difficult one for you, and how are you going to practice it in the next 24 hours?

okay, i'm done here.
LOL.

shit. i'm still bitching about that particular person. i need a new target board pleaseeeee.
:D

dear dear dear alison.
just know that God loves you! (:
He is your First Love.
just as He is all of ours (:

oh well.

GOD BLESS

2009-07-05T22:36:00.004+08:00

Freedom - Christian City Church

Verse:
If not for love
If not for grace
Or the sin that You erased
I will always have reason to praise

It's not by strength
It's not by might
By the cross unjustified
Though all else falls away
Still I'll praise

Chorus
Its for freedom that Christ has set us free
I live for You and not for me anymore
And Your mercy is new with every day
No longer will I forfeit grace
I'll follow You and live by faith

If not for love
Where would i be if not for love
If not for grace
Where would i be if not for grace

Bridge
You have made a way for us
When You died upon the cross

there you go, JOSHUA!
as promised, the nice catchy song from service today (:

walau.
BEN, GET WELL SOON LA.

GET WELL SOON YOU TOOT!!!

and and and.
seb tay volunteered for NDP without asking me along!
damn!
there goes a free ndp parade!
GAHHHHH.

bought coffee for pastor today!
omg, the order really is superbly special.
so special that i confused the starbucks staff.
LOL!
and yes josiah, she IS CUTE!
:D
see, even i also agree!
(:

alrighttttt.

nothing much to talk about.
maybe i might get quarantined too!
:D

hmmm.

well, 2 verses in the Bible struck me the most during the service.

Matthew 6:28-30 (New American Standard Bible)

²⁸"And why are you ^A)">(A)worried about clothing? Observe how the lilies of the field grow; they do not toil nor do they spin,
²⁹yet I say to you that not even ^B)">(B)Solomon in all his glory clothed himself like one of these.
³⁰"But if God so clothes the ^C)">(C)grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the furnace, will He not much more clothe you? ^D)">(D)You of little faith!
Romans 14:17 (New International Version)

¹⁷For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit,

hmmm. why do we earthly beings seek the materials and not the eternal, why do we store up riches on earth which moth, rust will take away. why do we not store up riches in heaven which will last us for eternity?

as i speak to you, your actions baffles me. why do you seem to take this form of privilege given to you for granted. why take someone's feelings and trample on it. this is blasphemy i would say! but as i've decided, it's your life, you run it. for when judgement day comes, you will be the one answering for all of your actions.

the past few days i've been reading this book of my sister called vive la paris. though it came across as a kiddy book, but when taking on a literature point of view upon the book. delving deeper into the contents, i start to realise and see, how much truth of this worldly society we live in. the deep dark valleys that we are trodding in. the setting of the book is of this young girl who used to live in her own pampered world, but as she took a step out of her comfort zone to know and try to understand more of the cruelty of this world, she feel entrapped and overcomed with the questions and the darkness. the book left me thinking.
maybe when i've sort out the different flying thoughts that are hard to pen down right now, i'll explain more.

till then

GOD BLESS

2009-07-05T00:31:00.001+08:00

dangssssssss.

i'm sleepy.

in fact, i have no business to be here for.
i am just bored.
:D

went to sell tickets for np concert band and np strings.
it was damn messy!
and towards the standard of the band...
HAHAHAHA. no comments!

oh dear.

i've not been messaging yiching!
D:
i miss you, lee yiching!

and and and,
MOUSEY.
GET WELL SOON!
cheer up!
i promise you to go out alright!
(:
and i'll listen to you whine/ talk/ laugh/ cry/ bullcrap/ whatever you want!
(:

gosh.
i guess i'm really bored.

alrighttttt.
shall go disturb josiah then.
give him nightmares of _______!
LOL.
cause i just learned of it from joshua! ^^v

OH OH.
zone weekend tmr!
:D
and i have to help pastor buy coffee.
special order too!
HAHAHA.

ben's getting enlisted on thursday.
damn.
BEN I AM SO GONNA MISS YOU!
gosh.
really really hope you'll like the scrapbook when it comes back to you in a few hours time!
:D
i put in effort for it okay!
with many many help from ben ong and yujie!
HAHAHA.

hmmm.
had kind of a great talk with alison about FAITH.
guess the talk kinda reminded me what is FAITH too!
(:
so you see, my dear friend
you are helping me learn and grow in faith too, not only am i helping you right now!
its always a two way thing.
(:
for God works in such a great way.
remember, He always has His own timetable!

jeremiah and cailing are so CUTE together!
HAHAHA.
oops jere.
so sorry that you had to carry the tripod stand and camera all the way to town and we didn't take any photos in the end!
D:

and, the earthquake we had in swensens was...
HAHAHA.
filled with food colouring, cailing!
:D

time to rotttttt.

GOD BLESS (:

2009-07-02T23:40:00.003+08:00

i am so dead.
i am not done with the thing yet,
i am still wasting time blogging this out.
i am such a procrastinator.

OH MANNNNNNN.
D:

its time to get down to work!
but i'm far to lazy to move my lazy hands and start doing the thing.
HAHA.
i bet you guys are curious to know what the thing is right!
don't tell you!
okay, pardon me.
i am just feeling rather high now, for no apparent reason.

i want to play turbo subs all dayyyy!
heh.

congratulate me please!
i am finally going to cell group tomorrow!
MUAHAHAHAHA.

i shall be nice and stop dissing people!
:D

but some people just pisses me off.
i know that renwei is very clear who.
HAHAHA.
oh well.
(:

remember, i am a very nice person!
:D

GOD BLESS

2009-06-29T22:29:00.005+08:00

HELLO ONCE AGAIN.

my com died in school today. cause i was super engrossed in playing my turbo subs.
muahahaha.
and i got bingxin addicted too!
:D

the blog is a place that is filled with ironies and cynical words or sentences which can be read off this space of mine.
words that have double meanings, sentences that can mean either a way or another.
its just like a double edged sword.
hmm.
so, did you get any of the skepticism?
maybe your level just ain't there.

its just so easy to hurt a person. and you've done it without thinking.
no, i'm not the one who's being hurt.
but, sometimes.
reflect and think carefully.
don't be so rash to blog out everything in that tiny space that you have (no, you don't even own it) in the cyberworld.

i've a lot more to say.
but once again.
who am i to judge?
for there's no right or wrong, in this arena of life.

damn, i've to learn to express myself better and better my english standard!
i'm rather disappointed with my english now.
):

GOD BLESS <3

p.s i'm just rambling to myself here in this useless space of mine (:

2009-06-29T14:10:00.002+08:00

got this from facebook once again

True giving happens when you are overflowing from the inside, and cannot help but share. When there is so much love within you that it has to flow to others or you would burst open. There is no thinking involved, no willpower in such sharing. It just flows out. If you have to force yourself to be kind, to love, to feel compassion, you've missed the first step of filling in your own Self with these emotions.

hmmm. thought provoking.

yup, it's time i learn to share the love that God has provided for me.
(:

this morning, i've finally decided to listen to delirious? once again.
and boy oh boy do i miss their songs!
:D

Miracle Maker - Delirious?
I’m waiting here for my life to change,
When the waters stir you can rearrange me.
Just one touch is all I need,
I’ve nothing much but the wounds I feel,
I’m looking for the hand of the miracle man.

Holy, you are holy,
Who was and is and is to come.
Holy, you are holy, Saviour, Healer,
I’m standing at the feet of the miracle maker.

I’m holding on, with your life in mine,
Living water’s come,
And you’ve rearranged me.

Holy you are holy,
Who was and is and is to come.
Holy, you are holy,
Saviour, healer,
I’m staring in the face of the miracle maker.

Holy, you are holy,
Who was and is and is to come.
Jesus, precious Jesus,
Thank you, Saviour,
I’m walking in the shoes of my miracle maker.
I’m standing with the faith of a miracle maker.

HEH.

time to rottttttttt.
:D

GOD BLESS <3
esp you. good bye.

2009-06-28T22:55:00.000+08:00

Due to the fact that Josiah says I cannot type in perfect english, hence, this sentence is typed to prove to him that I can type in perfect english!

there you go, my dear!

(:

2009-06-28T21:49:00.007+08:00

hmmm.

people change, don't they?

to the least of my surprise, i ain't at all feeling anything towards THAT piece of news.
:D
(flyer siol~)

i'm so goddamn proud of myself.
no wonder in church, when i was praying, i heard God telling me that i will discover smth but i will not feel any pain or anything, cause i know, i have HIS love.
and i only need HIS LOVE!
:D

Sing Sing Sing - Chris Tomlin
Sing, sing, sing
And make music with the heavens
We will sing, sing, sing
Grateful that You hear us
When we shout your praise
Lift high the name of Jesus

What's not to love about You?
Heaven and earth adore You
Kings and kingdoms bow down
Son of God, You are the One
You are the one

You are the love that frees us
You are the light that leads us
Like a fire burning
Son of God, You are the one
You are the one we're living for

Sing, sing, sing
And make music with the heavens
We will sing, sing, sing
Grateful that You hear us
When we shout your praise
Lift high the name of Jesus

What's not to love about You?
Heaven and earth adore You
Kings and kingdoms bow down
Son of God, You are the One
You are the one we're living for

Sing, sing, sing
And make music with the heavens
We will sing, sing, sing
Grateful that You hear us
When we shout your praise
Lift high the name of Jesus

yessss. i will sing Your praises day and night!
I LOVE YOU LORD.
for You loved me no matter what i've done, no matter how i've sinned.
WHAT IS NOT TO LOVE ABOUT YOU, TELL ME!
:D
i'm so in love with You, my Lord.

yay!

hmmm. i'm amazed by how FAST you changed.
amazement amazement.

jere, as you've said.
CHICKEN AIRRRRRRRRRRR.
:D

btw, the da vinci exhibition was bastardized by jere, joel and davin.
T_T
of which, one seems to be a bastard himself.
LOL.

lalalala.
i'm having much fun teasing.
(to myself: walau, stop being so mean. though i know my standard is by leaps and bounds better. don't laugh when other's twit! LOL!)
:D

walau. i need to RUN soon la.
if not, come this trng, i'm so DEAD.
OMFG.

and, i still have that thing to do!
omg.
send me the photossssssss.
i need 54 la!

i'm leading a happy and contented life now!
wheeeeeeeeee.

omg omg omg.
YICHING IS BACK IN SINGAPOREEEEEEEEE.

LEE YICHING!!!
meet you soon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I LOVE YICHING
I LOVE YICHING
I LOVE YICHING.

haha, yiching, no need to thank me for being excited that you're back!
:D

and, damn. ben's going NS soon.
means i can't bitch about _______ more!
HUR.

anywww.
school starts tmr, which means CT papers will be back!
oh man.
only tell me the good ones pleaseeeee. ):

DAMN. josiah's hols starts tmr!
more hols for me too pleaseeeeee. ):

alrighttt.

GOD BLESS! <3
(i feel so mean, i didn't pay attention to pst derek's sermon much D: )

2009-06-25T23:07:00.002+08:00

for now.

i shall leave this space alone.
too much negativity kills, right?

(:

anyw, its been 2 weeks pal!

hmmm.

i've thoughts and feelings that i am not able to pen it down.
shall just let it float around in my mind.

TILL I HAVE DECIDED TO RESURRECT THIS PIECE OF A SHITTY BLOG.
like how Jesus was resurrected!
HAHA.
oh God, give me strength.

GOD BLESS <3

2009-06-25T00:32:00.003+08:00

i realised that writing here would be far too suggestive that activates the guessing facility in one's brains.

hence, i have decided to not type any sentences that requires guessing or thinking.
(:
simple?

well, that will be something which i have to really try hard at doing.
:D

ben tan, ben ong, alison, me, sebby chu, joshua at service last sun! (:

i'm tired. mentally.

thursday!
:D
yay!

ain't in the mood to blog about the second trng.
so then,

GOD BLESS <3

2009-06-23T23:27:00.002+08:00

i'm back!
:D

haha.
went for the loft stayover and then to pasir ris park to camp!
(:
not in the mood to explain fully.

but, the loft was superbly nice!
(:

hmmm.
i wore my emotions on my sleeve this afternoon.
i apologize for that.
i should have learnt to better conceal it.

i'm starting to miss all the old old songs.
haha.
esp after service on sun, the carpenters, bee gees, abba, westlife, etc etc.
:D

i'm so dead tired now.

seriously, other than missing my room esp my bed and aircon. i don't quite miss certain things at home.
but, its the imperfections in life that makes us a better person.
yes, no?
(:

i'm tired mentally right now.

ugh.

and i still so damn ____ you so.

its just so hard to forget, a feeling so strong.

oh well.

trng tmr!
:D

i loveeeeeeeeeeeeee LSCT SOCIETY!
:D

GOD BLESS!

2009-06-21T00:38:00.001+08:00

time can't erase a feeling this strong.

2009-06-20T22:22:00.004+08:00

got this message from facebook. hmm. pretty interesting as i was thinking of the problems that i'm currently facing. God really does speak into me. (:

If all you had to do was wish for something and you would have it, life would be pretty boring, wouldn't it? God placed barriers between us and what we want, so we can enjoy interesting and satisfying lives. God hid our biggest rewards behind the highest barriers - our deepest fears. God wants us to face our fears, and hold ground in their presence, and let them go, and that's how we get out biggest rewards. What are you most afraid of? Say it, just start by saying it.

ugh. i am starting to detest being at home. T.T

its like, everyone's temper seems to be on the rise. esp my mum's. damnit. why she can never listen to me and let things go at times. fuck.

anyw, ytd's food for alumni dinner was good! :D
HAHAHAHA.

i am just freaking tired now.
my eyes are like burning.

hmmm. things at home are seriously starting to get on my nerves!
UGH.
i want some peace and harmony please.
i am easily contented, just give me the space and respect i deserve.

the day was alright..
till i stepped foot home.
is this even called a home.
omgwtfbbq.

shit. i suddenly forgot what i initially wanted to blog about.
i've lost all motivation to explain myself and to elaborate on anything, anything at all!
DAMN IT.

things seems to be taking a downturn from here.
and i abhor this gawddamned feeling.

unwritten sorrows, unspoken thoughts.

and i still ____ you so.

never mind.
i'm excited about church tmr!
:D

hmm. just some wild thoughts going through me and its hard to explain. ugh.

i need to breathe too alright?

i'm tired.
really.

GOD BLESS

2009-06-19T00:48:00.001+08:00

once again, facebook proved to be freaky or rather.
God just wants to speak to me.

(:

Renee got a message that on this day, God wants her to know...

... that doubt is the greatest gift, - it's the space between two certainties.

Any change on its way from one place of stability to the next one, passes through a period of doubt. Your old perspective has to disintegrate, and doubt comes in for a visit - even if only for a moment, before the new perspective takes root. Doubt is your greatest gift, because from doubt you can go anywhere.

omg.
HAHA.

2009-06-18T22:31:00.004+08:00

such a pretty song. (:
hmm.
anyw, liu geng hong sang this song in church last year to propose to his then girlfriend now wife.
sweet ain't he?
(:

remind me again, why did i go to church for?
HEH.
found this small part of pastor kong's sermon.
great reminder. (:
more of You, Lord.

DEEPER IN LOVE WITH YOU, LORD.
its the season for change.
to be more like You.
ever so loving, caring, patient, forgiving.

yet another reminder to not be a christian by profession, but to have a true relationship with God.
(:

why, God, don't you just so love me!
giving me reminders when i feel like i'm slipping and falling.
(:
i will learn to WALK THE WALK and not just talk the talk.
and i know Lord, You will guide me along. (:

You will never give me challenges You know i cannot handle.
and when i can't handle, it is to remind me to rely on You.
for You are the only constant.
the only One who loves me and sent Your son to die for me on the cross.

well, had first training ytd.
GOOD JOB EVERYONE!
:D
shan't elaborate much. HEH.

hmmm. why is it that humans can change overnight and be so easily affected?
why do we always succumb to our feelings and emotions?
why can't we gain better control of ourselves?
is it just human nature or is it just us being worldly?

i'm not in much of a mood to blog further.

i'll only ever give me all.
TAKE IT ALL, MY LORD.

i am too tired of my emotions, take it all away my Lord.
for You said Your yoke is light, i shall rest my burdens on You.
THANK YOU LORD!

i will NEVER be ashamed of You!
(:

alumni dinner tmr, anyw.

shall go and bum ard a little.
(:

GOD BLESS <3

2009-06-15T01:41:00.001+08:00

this is freaking alright.
got this from facebook.

God wants you to know:
Just rest for a moment. It's OK. Yes, things are crazy, yes, the world is going nuts. Yet, deep underneath the stormy waves, there, in the core of your being, there is pure silence, pure love. And ... it's ... just ... OK.

2009-06-14T22:42:00.003+08:00

GOSH.
SERVICE ROCKED TODAY!
:D
now i'm awaiting yujie to upload the photos to send to me!
NIU NAI!!!!
haha.

met alison at amk before heading to jp for breakfast with ben and joshua.
as usual, alison was late!
MUAHAHAHA.
then ben had to buy breakfast for us first, and he felt like a daddy buying breakfast sets for his children!
please lor, if he really is my daddy, i think i will be the saddest kid on earth!
HAHA.
celebrity weekend was cool shit!
we had, ou de yang, niu nai, liu geng hong, vivi, tbc, jacelyn tay etc etc.
but the part me and alison went crazy was when liu geng hong, niu nai, ou de yang and tbc performed.
OMG.
they are just so..... AMAZING.
esp NIU NAI!
HAHA
alison just practically went GUY CRAZY!
she squeezed to take a photo of niu nai!
hahahahahaha.
it was just damn high.
:D
and, the miss indonesia 2008 is superbly PRETTY!
omg.
alison says she don't mind turning les for her!
HAHAHA.
aren't you alr les!
anyw i'm just really glad that alison enjoyed the celebrity weekend.
(:
and i was so touched by what pastor tan said today.
that no matter how far we walked away from God, He still wants us back.
no matter how much we're sinning, or have sinned, Jesus still loves us.
DEEPER IN LOVE WITH YOU, JESUS.
oh oh!
niu nai was damn cute!
cause after the service there's a photo taking session, so many people tried to squeeze onto the stage to take a picture with him.
and he said.

大家好您现在所在参观的是来自台湾的牛奶,

请不要挤压或捏他!

but the short video by allan moo really showed me how fortunate i am to have my parents.
the answer given by the girl was so true and it just hit hard on me.
there are so many things which i took for granted that they do not have.
to me, water running out from the tap is nothing unusual and when the water flow is slightly smaller, complains will flow in.
but the kids in tong ren, guizhou had to go to a water source everyday and carry water back to their school to use.
we singaporeans are really a fortunate lot.
thank God for His love!

hmm. i'm a little too lazy to blog out everything. so the above was just an excerpt of what i felt.

HAHAHA.
JOKE SIA.

anyw, after the entire mayhem, we went to lunch at the "best" choice coffeeshop.
HAHAHA.
the dry ban mian there is really not bad!
:D
then took a bus aft lunch with alison to jp in order to train back home.
but before that we walked ard and bought macarons!
:D
YUM. the chocolate one is... HEAVEN.
HAHA.
the icing shop gave me an idea for something.
(:
HEH.

hmmm. reading what you wrote there just made me felt worse.
it felt as though i was the one who ruined everything.

and, i want to buy the recoded 2 shirt!
it looks good. ^^v
alison wants it to!
HAHA.

hmmm.
inflx of emotions once again.

had a happy stint just now.
:D
cause of a msg.
(:
see, i'm easily contented!
HAHAHAHA.

OH OH.
NUM IS HAVING 50% OFF ALL HAIVANAS ('cept those metallic ones)
i want to buy!
T_T
so does cl and alison.
HAHAHA.
maybe i will get them.
my orange haivanas is about to say goodbye to me.
maybe i should get another haivanas flash!
:D
shall see.

alrighty.

I AM REALLY GETTING TO LAZY TO TYPE FURTHER.
wanted to update how i was impacted during the video but am too lazy now.
so, sue me!
:D

GOD BLESS

2009-06-14T00:19:00.003+08:00

A Little Too Not Over You - David Archuleta

It never crossed my mind at all
That's what I tell myself
What we had has come and gone
You're better off with someone else

It's for the best I know it is but I see you
Sometimes I try to hide what I feel inside
And I turn around, you're with him now
I just can't figure it out

Tell me why you're so hard to forget
Don't remind me, I'm not over it
Tell me why I can't seem to face the truth
I'm just a little too not over you, not over you

Aren't memories supposed to fade?
What's wrong with my heart?
Shake it off, let it go
Didn't think it'd be this hard

Should be strong, movin' on but I see you
Sometimes I try to hide what I feel inside
And I turn around, you're with him now
I just can't figure it out

Tell me why you're so hard to forget
Don't remind me, I'm not over it
Tell me why I can't seem to face the truth
I'm just a little too not over you

Maybe I regret everything I said
No way to take it all back, yeah
Now I'm on my own, how I let you go
I'll never understand
I'll never understand!

Tell me why you're so hard to forget
Don't remind me, I'm not over it
Tell me why I can't seem to face the truth
I'm just a little too not over you

Tell me why you're so hard to forget
Don't remind me, I'm not over it
Tell me why I can't seem to face the truth
And I really don't know what to do
I'm just a little too not over you, not over you

hmmm. great song.
(:

went for class bbq today.
but before that went to imm's giant with estella, pierre (estella's younger bro, DAMN CUTE), qiudong and johan to shop for the food before heading to gerald's place in LITTLE INDIA.
HAHAHA.
dangerous area please!
btw, the chicken wings which gerald's mum marinated was superbly niceeeeeee.
:D
haha.
I BURNT MYSELF LA.
and, i'm damn proud of myself and qiudong okay.
WE STARTED THE FIRE RATHER QUICKLY!
:D
but the pro-est fire starter i think should be jeremy (he came to crash).
HAHA, he and his BLOWING skills.
rofl la.
and gerald hosted his LIM CAN'T COOK show in front of us.
cause his potatoes were freaking hard, as he refused to boil them at his place just now!
thus he resorted to eating potato skin!
JOKE!
hahahaha.
the food we had was... WHOA.
chicken wings, hotdogs, crabstick, satay, otah, stingray, sotong, prawns, sweet potatoes, corn, the now infamous lim can't cook potatoes and the almighty MARSHMELLOWS.
it was fun!
:D
and initially our pit was infested with the "friends" of our very own can't see in the dark fellow.
HAHAHA.

i'm currently too lazy to blog out the whole process that happened today starting from the shopping at giant.
lol.

hmmm. looking towards the sea. the usual sight of the different liners and cargo ships lined the horizon, their lights dotting the line.
that sight reminded me of something.
the exchange of words, the everything.
hmmm.

church tmr!
:D
alee is coming with me!
THANKS ALEE!
TATU FOR LIFEEEEEEE!
renee <3 alee!

haha, cailing went for the da vinci exhibition today!
i want to go too!
):
renee <3 cailing!

and alee, the plan tmr.
^^v
we shall do it tgt!
:D
YAY-NESS!

well, guess today has been a fairly well day. (:
'cept for the damn emotions today that kept running through me.
but, right now, all's well.
:D
thank God for that! (:

alrighty.
i shall go listen to the full album of david archuleta which alee just sent me!
:D

GOD BLESS
*excites about celebrity weekend tmr in church!*
:D

2009-06-13T00:25:00.002+08:00

why is it always when the night is quiet and all is solemn that i get a sudden influx of emotions.

hmm. i'm still feeling rather shocked over the emotion that came so quick to me on wed.

my oh my.
i guess i am feeling more than i should be.
but since when is there a right or wrong in such stuff?

how ironic.
to label a right and wrong on it.
and this is a point of paramount knowledge.

please let the damn emotions go away.

i really (insert verb here) you so.
zzz.

2009-06-12T22:17:00.003+08:00

hmmm. had a new revelation today again.
but sticking to it will ba a huge problem.
oh well.
no harm trying, right?

Whatever Will Be - Vanessa Anne Hudgens

Sometimes I feel like I'm a bird with broken wings
At times I dread my now and envy where I've been
But that's when quiet wisdom takes control
At least I've got a story no one's told

[Chorus]
I finally learned to say
Whatever will be will be
I've learned to take
The good, the bad and breathe
'Cause although we like
To know what life's got planned
No one knows if shooting stars will land

These days it feels naive to put your faith in hope
To imitate a child, fall backwards on the snow
'Cause that's when fears will usually lead you blind
But now I try to under-analyse

[Chorus]

Is the rope I walk wearing thin?
Is the life I love caving in?
Is the weight on your mind
A heavy black bird caged inside?

Say
Whatever will be will be
Take
The good, the bad
Just breathe

'Cause although we like
To know what life's got planned
No one knows if shooting stars will land

Whatever will be will be
I learned to take
The good, the bad and breathe
'Cause although we like
To know what life's got planned
Thing like that are never in your hands
No one knows if shooting stars will land

hmmm. maybe, maybe not.

the day started quite a bore, went to sch and had to copy the answers for the logbook, traced out all the marine creatures.

then was rotting away with renwei after jeremiah and cailing left.

well, things started to pick up after bingxin, wendy, wy, sasa, leiting and sherman came.
HAHA.

we "sorted" out the clubhouse a little.
:D
haha, it was smelly, musty, stuffy, dusty, humid in there!
but nonetheless, things were fun.
HAHAHA.
sasa's constant doodling amused us.
:D
and the, no please go away as well!
(:

hmm. i have yet to know the plans for the bbq tmr la!
HAHA.
gosh.
i have no mood for it suddenly.
zzz.

hmmm.
do you know i _____ you so.

i think i know the reasons behind the actions.
but, how am i going to have any form of confirmation for it?

oh well.
leave all things into the hands of God.

prolly, from evidence gathered, you can deduce that i'm not in a blogging mood.

hols are a bore if there's nth to do!
gosh.

GOD BLESS

2009-06-11T23:43:00.002+08:00

CTs are over, hols are here.
but i am hardly feeling the heat and the excitement.
D:
crazy much?

goshhhh.
lee yichingggggggg.
i'm awaiting your arrival back in singapore.
HAHA.
:D

and i totally screwed up the aqua paper today.
i gave up and just handed in the paper.
the paper was just being a bitch.
HAHAHA.

and i have yet to do my logbook.
OH MY.
i shall go draw them later.
haha.
cause i'm still not in the mood to do anything constructive.
:D

hmmm.

life's starting to become a bore.
D:

why oh why.

hmmm. emotions much?

on a lighter note,
TRAININGS RESUME NEXT WED!
YAYNESS!
:D
*excites*
i miss trngs la.
lolololol.

and the loft stayover!
:D
*awaits*

i shall go find more stuff to do!
HAHAHAHA.

i shall maintain my happiness.
(:

hope the campfire's great tonight.
heh.
too tired to attend re-code 2 camp.
my brain ain't functioning at all now.
it has ceased all operations.
lol.

GOD BLESS.
*awaits for service on sun :D*

2009-06-10T21:03:00.004+08:00

hmmm.

great day out i would say.
HAHA.
spam-ed lemon butter sauce and chip spice on my new york fish & chips at fish&co!
:D

i had funnnnnnnnnnn today!
esp watching you unwrap the layers of newspaper wrapping!
HAHAHAHA.
:D
thanks yo!
especially to you for agreeing to come out with us!
:D
hmmm. there's a lot i want to say, but guess i shall keep it for myself for now.
((:
no doubt, i will miss talking to you.
HAHA.

i think i've not walked ard so much for quite some time.
cause i've been spending time sitting down and studying or just talking to cailing and alison.
LOL.
thus, i'm really sleepy now!

and i'm surprised.
so my facade seems to be working afterall, even for you!
YAY ME!
:D

and i have not started on studying for aqua culture!
D:
KILL ME PLEASE.

right now i have zero mood.
the emotion came so quick and sudden that it knocked the wind out of me.
till now, i'm speechless and am unable to say it out.
damn.
the empty space in there is really killing me.
and i can literally feel my life being taken apart bit by bit.

i'm sure i'll be fine in a while!
at least i think so.

influx of emotions.
damn these emotions.
i thought i was ready, but i wasn't.
not now.
let me get over it pleaseeeeeeee.

UGH.

its not working and nothing is going to help right now.
nvm.
i shall go take a nap.
maybe all will be better when i wake up.

GOD BLESS

2009-06-09T23:00:00.008+08:00

hmmm.
was reminded of this song on alee's ipod today.
kinda... applies.
heh.
nice.
i got addicted to this song thanks to mouse 3 years ago!
HAHA.

oh man.
mouse, unknowingly, we've known each other for... 4years?
whoa, time flies.
HAHA.

yunjieeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
i miss you so so so so much la!
HAHAHAHA.

today's math was alright i guess.
so soshi,
i'm not going to die okay!
:D
thus no new lsct clubhouse building once again!
lol.

stayed in school to talk rubbish and just randomly flipped through alee's ipod.
(:

guess its just the motions, time and time again.
hope tmr will be a greattttttttt day.
:D
cause...
HEH.
its good enough just for me to know.
(:

i have zilch mood to study for aqua now.
CRAP.

and, joshua wants to bitch slap me!
see, joshua told ya.
YOU ARE THE BITCH!
cause only the bitch is able to bitch slap someone!
hahahaha.

well, had kinda of a great talk with ben last night.
but still seriously, i still feel like rolling my eyes at her!
HAHAHAHA.

i shall go and find more random stuff to do.

:D

GOD BLESS THOSE HAVING INAC PAPER TMR!
and those who have papers tmr as well.
lol!

When There Was You and Me - HSM 1

It's funny when you find yourself
Looking from the outside
I'm standing here but all I want
Is to be over there
Why did I let myself believe
Miracles could happen
Cause now I have to pretend
That I don't really care

I thought you were my fairytale
A dream when I'm not sleeping
A wish upon a star
That's coming true
But everybody else could tell
That I confused my feelings with the truth
When there was me and you

I swore I knew the melody
That I heard you singing
And when you smiled
You made me feel
Like I could sing along
But then you went and changed the words
Now my heart is empty
I'm only left with used-to-be's
Once upon a song

Now I know your not a fairytale
And dreams were meant for sleeping
And wishes on a star
Just don't come true
Cause now even I could tell
That I confused my feelings with the truth
Cause I liked the view and
When there was me and you

I can't believe that
I could be so blind
It's like you were floating
While I was falling
And I didn't mind

Cause I liked the view
Thought you felt it too
When there was me and you

alrighty.
its once again pictures time!
taken from our "mugging" session on sun at bishan lib!

old school biscuits! :D

super duper nice packaging right!

the banana choc pocky which cailing and alee loves it while jeremiah hates it.
HAHA

see, the monkey on the packaging wants a bite too!

the star food of the day!
haha.
:D

and we allowed our creative juices to flow!
the best part being, when we were drawing, the librarian came over and tell us we are not allowed to eat in the library!
HAHA.

and my dinner from 2 nights ago.
from this restaurant called HOOKED.

my sis' kids meal. i like the smiley potatoes.
if only every smile were as pure as that, as true as that, as happy as that.

my spaghetti with pan grilled sea bass.
the highlight being, the tomato!
HAHA.
somehow, the tomato is still juicy within!

and dessert at cheeky chocolates!
:D
chocolate crepe with chocolate ice cream!
MUAHAHAHAHA.
sinfullllllllllllllll.
:D

okay, this is a super long post.
shall end here!
i took ONE HOUR TO BLOG LA!
omg.

GOD BLESS

2009-06-09T01:05:00.002+08:00

i've yet to start on math.
i'm so fried!

oh my oh my.

i shall wake up earlier later to study mathhhhh.
hopefully, can catch benedict before my paper to go through my questions?

emotions running amok once again.
damn it all.

a sudden bout of _______ ___ is getting to me.

and its messing up me head.

Papercut lyrics - Linkin Park

Why does it feel like night today?
Something in here's not right today
Why am I so uptight today?
Paranoia's all I got left

I don't know what stressed me first
Or how the pressure was fed
But I know just what it feels like
To have a voice in the back of my head

It's like a face that I hold inside
A face that awakes when I close my eyes
A face watches every time I lie
A face that laughs every time I fall
(And watches everything)

So I know that when it's time to sink or swim
That the face inside is hearing me
Right underneath my skin

It's like I'm paranoid lookin' over my back
It's like a whirlwind inside of my head
It's like I can't stop what I'm hearing within
It's like the face inside is right beneath my skin

I know I've got a face in me
Points out all my mistakes to me
You've got a face on the inside too and
Your paranoia's probably worse

I don't know what set me off first
But I know what I can't stand
Everybody acts like the fact of the matter is
I can't add up to what you can

But everybody has a face that they hold inside
A face that awakes when I close my eyes
A face watches every time they lie
A face that laughs every time they fall
(And watches everything)

So you know that when it's time to sink or swim
That the face inside is watching you too
Right inside your skin

It's like I'm paranoid lookin' over my back
It's like a whirlwind inside of my head
It's like I can't stop what I'm hearing within
It's like the face inside is right beneath the skin

It's like I'm paranoid lookin' over my back
It's like a whirlwind inside of my head
It's like I can't stop what I'm hearing within
It's like the face inside is right beneath my skin

The face inside is right beneath your skin
The face inside is right beneath your skin
The face inside is right beneath your skin

The sun goes down
I feel the light betray me
The sun goes down
I feel the light betray me

It's like I'm paranoid lookin' over my back
(The sun)
It's like a whirlwind inside of my head
It's like I can't stop what I'm hearing within
It's like the face inside is right beneath the skin
(I feel the light betray me)

It's like I'm paranoid lookin' over my back
(The sun)
It's like a whirlwind inside of my head
It's like I can't stop what I'm hearing within
It's like I can't stop what I'm hearing within
(I feel the light betray me)

It's like I can't stop what I'm hearing within
(The sun)
It's like the face inside is right beneath my skin

Paper Cut - Vanessa Anne Hudgens

It's not a feeling like when you touch a flame
No, it's not like when someone calls you a bad name
It's not like the hurt when you slip and fall down
No, it's not like anyof these, what I've found is

Your love hurts like a paper cut, so sweet
never even feel the slice; you're so deep
It seems so hard as, but only at first
Cause like a paper cut the pain grows worse.

Oh, oh

It's not so much in the words that you don't say
It's when you act in the distant, cold way
It's more in your eyes how you look at me
Like you no longer care for what I see

Your love hurts like a paper cut, so sweet
never even feel the slice; you're so deep
It seems so hard as, but only at first
Cause like a paper cut the pain grows worse.

You had to go and show me just how good, your love could be
Then you threw it all away
Now I can't help but feel a brand new pain
So I'm asking baby, please stay.

Your love hurts like a paper cut, so sweet
never even feel the slice; you're so deep
It seems so hard as, but only at first
Cause like a paper cut the pain grows worse.

Oh, oh
Oh, oh
The pain grows worse
Oh, oh
Oh, oh
The pain grows worse
Oh, oh
The pains grows worse

both songs are called paper cut and its pretty nice. (:
hmm.
though it does not portray my feelings exactly.
but its somewhere along the line.

oh well.

i will survive.

2009-06-08T22:23:00.012+08:00

first thing first, EVERYONE SHOULD GO READ SOSHI'S BLOG!
MUAHAHAHA.
for this 2 particular posts, i've decided to link him on my blog!
its really super interesting.
:D
its a MUST READ.

secondly, i received this really cool email from my dad.
so, here goes:

YOU SAY	GOD SAYS	BIBLE VERSES
You say: 'It's impossible'	God says: All things are possible	(Luke 18:27)
You say: 'I'm too tired'	God says: I will give you rest	(Matthew 11:28-30)
You say: 'Nobody really loves me'	God says: I love you	(John 3:16 & John 3:34 )
You say: 'I can't go on'	God says: My grace is sufficient	(II Corinthians 12:9 & Psalm 91:15)
You say: 'I can't figure things out'	God says: I will direct your steps	(Proverbs 3:5-6)
You say: 'I can't do it'	God says: You can do all things	(Philippians 4:13)
You say: 'I'm not able'	God says: I am able	(II Corinthians 9:8)
You say:'It's not worth it'	God says: It will be worth it	(Roman 8:28 )
You say:< 'I can't forgive myself'	God says: I Forgive you	(I John 1:9 & Romans 8:1)
You say: 'I can't manage'	God says: I will supply all your needs	(Philippians 4:19)
You say: 'I'm afraid'	God says: I have not given you a spirit of fear	(II Timothy 1:7)
You say: 'I'm always worried and frustrated'	God says: Cast all your cares on ME	(I Peter 5:7)
You say: 'I'm not smart enough'	God says: I give you wisdom	(I Corinthians 1:30)
You say: 'I feel all alone'	God says: I will never leave you or forsake you	(Hebrews 13:5)

COOL RIGHT?
yup, our God is faithful and loving.
:D

anyw, MMB PAPER TODAY WAS OKAY!
:D
first time, i feel so accomplished after a paper!
HAHAHA.
though the mcqs are kind of a killer.
but, i managed to do the bulk of the 60marks short answer questions!
:D
HALLELUJAH!
HAHAHA.

hmmm.
if you've never noticed.
how you tear me down each time.
its time to do so now.

oh well.
on a happier note.
I AM NOW MOTIVATED TO STUDY FOR MATH.
cause i love the accomplished feeling.
to those taking IMM,
JIAYOU!
i know that the module is tough, but you all can do it!
GOD's BLESSING YOU ALL NOW!
:D

i forgot what i want to say earlier on.
tons of things were running through my mind just now which i wanna blog out.
but now, i forgot!
HAHA.
STM SIA!

OH,
on another happy note.
i finished one important task on hand!
:D

and soshi,
TOO BAD.
no RENEE BUILDING for LSCT SOCIETY!
hahahaha.
cause i decided not to die after as my mmb paper was OKAYYYYY!
:D

anyw i quote from alee's blog.

today thoughts:
is it so hard to forget somebody and get rid of that awkwardness?
even if somebody kinda hurt your feelings?
maybe when it comes, I may have some second thoughts.
P.S: I hope you will feel better soon kay :) There are many fishes left at sea :)
Since he dun cherish you, not worth keeping those sadness inside anymore :)

<3alee

HAHA.
well, its feeling ain't it?
so, it can't just be forgotten like that.
(:

right, i still have no answers.
no answers for myself, no answers for you.
but its alright.
i'll wait.
i'll wait for the answer to my soul, from God.
(:
i'll be patient and wait.

tmr is math paper.
I CAN DO IT!
:D

and btw, i spent so much time recoding the html code for the You say, God say thingy above okay.
once again, I FEEL ACCOMPLISHED!
:D
so, enjoy. (:

i shall go rant elsewhere.
(:

GOD BLESS

2009-06-07T22:59:00.001+08:00

i wish i wish i wish.
but happy endings belong to fairytales and fairytales aren't real right?

yes, i'm right.

the indian chariot thing that i mentioned earlier just went into full blast.
and guess what?!
there's lion and dragon dance for it!
and its freaking 11pm but i can't complain.
cause they have the police escorting the chariot carrying the god.
D:

HOW COOL IS THAT.
on christmas, lets go and carry a HUMUNGOUS cross around orchard and get the police to escort us as well :D

HAHAHAHA.
i've gotten a new revelation.

well, God speaks into me.
:D

yay-ness.

2009-06-07T22:20:00.001+08:00

i had an...
entertaining dinner tonight?
HAHA.
will post up the photos and further elaborate when i'm more of in the mood.

haha.
today cailing fully stretched her potential as a full fledge singaporean by letting her kiasu-ism go into FULL FORCE.
hahahahaha.
hmmm. today was slightly more productive than yesterday!
:D

there's still a lot weighing on my mind.
and it's tiring me out.

but i've promised not to whine so much anymore!
:D

so... YAY!

HAHAHAHA.

there's some weird indian chariot thing/ performance at my house downstairs.
and its disturbing my studying!
D:
omg.

i need new revelations.

yes alison.
let us both listen real hard for that tiny whisper of God.
:D

i'm happy now.
at least i got smth off my chest.
(:

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

tmr's mmb.
i'm so dead!
HAHAHAHA.

shall go study later.
take a rest now.

FIGHT WITH THE MICROBES LATER!
:D

heh.

GOD BLESS US TMR FOR CTs!

2009-06-07T00:17:00.012+08:00

PICTURESSSSSSSSSS
:D

peektures speaks a thousand words.
:D

birthday woman (with the super yummy cheesecake from bakerzin!)
HAHAHA.

(sitting)
me, clarence, clydina, michelle
(standing)
sharon, sherlyn, yvangeline

and the food today was mostly spicy.
szechuan ma la spicy.
WOOHOO.
I LIKE. :D
(can see from the pic, most of the dishes look RED)

the ever so cute, ehren

ethan. don't his specs remind you of harry potter?
HAHA.

clarence trying to kiss ethan!
HAHAHA.

me and sherlyn!

me, sherlyn, clydie (:

ehren was supposed to do a split as a pose like this!

HAHAHAHAHA.
sherlyn tried upteen times to take a good shot with ehren doing his all famous split!
:D

this is a super photo-y post.
HAHAHAHA.

2009-06-06T23:51:00.002+08:00

i realised.
i've been pretty selfish.

i'm sorry.

and my posts has been pretty down.

OH MY.
WHAT IN THE WORLD IS HAPPENING TO ME?

haha. don't worry.

i'm still JOYOUS!
:D

and i'm still waiting for the photos to be successfully transferred!
:D

I AM FINE!
HAHAHAHA.

anyw, got this on facebook.
its real COOL.
like God is speaking into my SOUL.
:D

You know how sometimes it seems that life is just throwing you one curved ball after another? Well, guess what, - you have a great way to respond! - you can use any excuse, any at all to be happy. Don't just soap your body in the shower - caress it and receive pleasure from touching and being touched. Don't just walk on the street - enjoy the fragrances of the trees and the flowers on your way. Don't just drive your car - sing karaoke to your favorite radio station.

2009-06-06T22:47:00.004+08:00

:D
back from the birthday celebration.
HAHAHAHAHA.

it was fun meeting up with my cuzziessss.
:D

shall post the photos once sherlyn uploaded into her com and send to me.
:D
and, thanks cuz for talking!
HEH.
i love my cousinssssssssssssssssss :D

had greattttttttt FUN "studying" with cailing and alison today at the library.
HAHAHAHA.
yeah, we talked more than we actually studied.
LOLOLOLOL.

i have a sudden urge to acquire many many dd toys.
soft toys esp!

oh oh.
j8 is opening up the shop, prize station!
:D
but i think i will stay away from the zhua zhua or otherwise known as kiap kiap machine for a loooooooooooong time.
and j, dont be sad over the fact that we never seem to win anything from the dumb machines!
there will always be gatacha pon!
HAHAHAHA.
:D

hmmm.
something you said last night really made sense.
whether we move on or not, its all psychological.
there's no such thing as time will heal, cause its all in the minddd.
if you refuse to let it heal, it will never heal.
it is up to us to move on and to embrace the new.
so, remember, its all in the mind.
:D
HAHA.
so true.
but i've decided otherwise.
at least, for now.

tmr, i am going to be a hardcore mugger.
i am going to further saturate my brain!
:D

daffy duck.
enough said.

today is a mostly happy day! (haha, i know my english sound broken. oh well)

i am going to start condensing my brain with BIG BIG SAT words after CTs.
well, for personal reasons!
:D

i'm getting tired.
but i will hang in there.

and, i saw susan lee at bishan today.
omgggggggggg.
HAHAHAHAHA.

Amazing Grace

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me.
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now I see.

T'was Grace that taught my heart to fear.
And Grace, my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear
The hour I first believed.

Through many dangers, toils and snares
I have already come;
'Tis Grace that brought me safe thus far
and Grace will lead me home.

The Lord has promised good to me.
His word my hope secures.
He will my shield and portion be,
As long as life endures.

Yea, when this flesh and heart shall fail,
And mortal life shall cease,
I shall possess within the veil,
A life of joy and peace.

When we've been here ten thousand years
Bright shining as the sun.
We've no less days to sing God's praise
Than when we've first begun.

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me.
I once was lost but now am found,
Was blind, but now I see.

i shall blog when i have more constructive stuff to say instead of just being random and ramble here.
:D

GOD BLESS :D

2009-06-05T22:12:00.008+08:00

YES.
1 DOWN, 3 MORE TO GO!
:D

CCTA SUCKS BIG TIME.
i just pray that i can pass.
i'm not asking much, just asking to pass.
let me pass, please.
pretty pretty preashhhhhh.
HAHA.

oh ya, rmb i mentioned about not doing my aqua logbook and then that God will provide a way?
DR NEVIL POSTPONED IT TO NEXT FRIDAY!
cause me, bx, renwei, wy, hongming went to "negotiate" with him which involves loud talking and consistent chattering.
HAHAHA.
dr nevil says we make good business people!
:D
but i'm not really that interested in business!
HAHAHA.
OMG.
I LOVE YOU, LORD.
see, God answers prayers.
:D

yes mouse.
let's head out!
:D
cause i miss you dearly.
lol.

hmmm.
its time to learn to control and conceal.
(:

我真地非常辛苦.
but i believe that it will get better with time and God's love.
i know i will regain control of my feelings and what's left will be sweet.
(:

time and space.
go figure.

now is the time and the season to let myself go in His love.
:D
God is the only constant.

backaches are a pain in the ass (lol, irony, its called a backache)
it springs an attack on me as and when it wants.
some warning please?
lololololol.

ROFL.
alison's name has been missued today by me, cailing and jere.
:D

my mummy damn cute.
she saw this quote stating that people who are born in the year of horse of 1990 (i am born in 1991 but its before the lunar new year) will be attracted to someone of the opposite sex but studies are more important, thus do not be to engrossed with the other party. she straightaway tell me about and pointed out to me the STUDIES IS MORE IMPORTANT part.
ROFL.
GAY GAY GAY GHEY!

alrightys.
time to take a break then start on studying for microbio!
:D
*yeah right, like i will :D*

this is what i got when i said i wanted mineral water from the swiss alps.
ROFL.

laughter, smiles, joyous feelings.
irony much?

GOD BLESS!

2009-06-04T22:28:00.005+08:00

hur.

i'm soooooooooooooo dead.
ccta's common test is tmr.
and i'm still not studying.
i mean, yeah i did study.
but it just went in and out.
i am in an utterly bad mood.

haven't been sleeping well for the past week.
and am still not sleeping well now.

why is it so hard to forget?

saw a damn cockroach today.
i must learn to overcome my fear for it, cause i have to face them alone now.
HAHAHA.

till now, my brain is still not processing, still not absorbing.
gosh. ccta sucks.
HAHA.
but cutting up the chick embryo is funnnnn. :D

more stuff to occupy my mind pleaseeeeeeeeeee.
lol.

and i've been eating a lot of rubbish food these days.
HAHA.
FATS ARE COMING MY WAY!
OMG :D
well, it does not signify that its back to normal though, its just a cover up.
D:

RAWR.

yiching!
I AM COUNTING DOWN TO YOUR RETURN FROM AUSSIE!
cause i am in a desperate need of a hug from you.
(:

mouseyyyyyyy.
NEXT FRI YOU WANT TO GO OUT?
:D
*excites about meeting you*
HAHAHAHA.
we should go out and have fun!
:D
its seriously lacking in my life now.

hmmm.

i ~~swear~~ (oops), i PROMISE that one of the reason why jeremiah was borned, is to annoy me! PFFT.
HAHAHA.

renee <3 cailing!
renee <3 alee!

i think i shall go nap before waking up to study for ccta! heh.

AND I HAVE YET TO DO MY AQUACULTURE LOG BOOK!
OMG.

i am so dead.
but, GOD WILL PROVIDE A WAY!
heh.

HAVE FAITH AND PRESS ON!

STAY HAPPY ALWAYS!
:D

GOD BLESS ME MANY MANY TMR FOR CCTA
hahahha

2009-06-04T15:22:00.000+08:00

I AM FINE!
:D

haha. got 43/50 for math!
YAY!

when the going gets tough, the tough gets going! (:

2009-06-04T01:18:00.001+08:00

the awkwardness and difference is so painfully obvious.

2009-06-04T00:10:00.004+08:00

went for recce at plmgs.
sorry ben!
kept putting things down.
just that, ah, its like reliving the memories all over again.

/edited.

WALAU. WHAT THE HELL.

me: walau, what kind of **** am i getting into?
ben: obviously all the wrong ones.

HAHAHA.

today, i signed a contract with waiyeong! and dr new was the witness!
the contract states that if waiyeong arrives at practical class at 9.45 and later, he has to pay S$1 for every minute. but if he reaches before 9.45 i will have to pay him S$2. and dr new was excited and he told me that once i started earning, i shall treat him to lunch. HAHA. see, waiyeong, dr new has no confidence in you! :D

Above It All - Building 429
Oh I'm waiting for the answer to the question in my soul
Lord why did You lead me here?
Because I, I take a look around and a desperate world surrounds me
And I know I'm not of this place, but it's here and in my face

And all that I am wants to run
Well God I feel helpless and undone

Lift me up above it all
I'm feeling broken and alone
Don't let me turn to stone
Lift my heart above it all
Because I've lost my hope tonight
And I'm praying for the strength to carry on
Lord will You lift me up above it all
Above it all

Now I'm waiting for a glimpse of hope in an eye
But a flash of sunlight shows a faded gray
Beause these streets are hard and cold
And the alleys burn like coal with a stench of helplessness
And all the life that's been misspent

And all that I am wants to run
God I feel helpless and undone

Lift me up above it all
I'm feeling broken and alone
Don't let me turn to stone
Lift my heart above it all
Because I've lost my hope tonight
And I'm praying for the strength to carry on
Lord will You lift me up above it all
Well above it all

*Bridge*
Maybe I'm not supposed to fly
Cause Maybe You want me here tonight

To lift them up above it all
When they're broken and alone
Don't let me turn to stone
Lift them up above it all
Because they cannot stand alone
And they're praying for the strength to carry on

Lift us up above it all
When we're broken and alone
Don't let us turn to stone
Lift us up above it all
Because we cannot stand alone
And we're praying for the strength to carry on
Lord will You lift us up above it all

i dont think i will ever want to open this pandora's box anymore.
shut it in and be fine. :D

GOD BLESS US FOR OUR CTS!

2009-06-03T11:13:00.010+08:00

:D

just great books

/edited.
i am not going to be so negative anymore. (:

i'm so fried for ccta.
zzz.

/edited

and since ben kindly complimented me by saying that i am very emotionally stable for a girl, i shall remain stable.
:D
thanks ben!
brother for life! HAHAHA.
and what GSS sale!
zzz.

well, let time settle it all. (:

and i just realised last night,
IT HAS BEEN INFILTRATED BY CHEENAS!

meeting joshua and ben later to go to plmgs.
HAHA.

i'm bored.
BORED.

i dont know how to express my feelings anymore.
(:

time, time, time is all i need now.

need to learn to be more independent.
(:

I Believe There Is More - Don Moen
You have been good to me
You have been good to me
You have been gracious
You have been faithful
Meeting my needs
Lord, it's so plain to see
You have been good to me
I have been given so much I can't even
Begin to thank You

Chorus:
And still I believe there is more
I believe there is more
I believe
So open my hands to receive
All that Your love has in store
Lord, I believe

Everything I have done
All that I've said and sung
Lifting Your story giving You glory
That's just the beginning
Father, I know there is more
Power to heal and restore
Miracles wonders blessings unnumbered
Love never-ending

(Chorus)

Exceeding abundantly
More than our minds can imagine
Love overflowing
You are bestowing
Day after day after day

(Verse 1)

(Chorus 2x)

Lord, I believe
Lord, I believe
Lord, I believe

2009-06-03T01:25:00.004+08:00

GOD HAS BEEN FAITHFUL!
:D

for He showed me the right path to tread on.
(:

HEH.

yeah it does hurt, but i'll survive.
(:
cause all i wanted was just for you to be happier
(:
well, you spoke my words for me.
(:
i'm glad.

/edited

I'M GOING TO SMILE CAUSE IT HAPPENED!

anyw, its takes me more muscles to frown than smile.
( a fact made known to me by aaron 2 years back. HAHA )
HEH.

thus the revelation of the traffic light is true!
HAHA.

and and and.

JOSHUA IS A PIECE OF SHIT.
USE MY NAME FOR JOKES ONE MORE TIME.
I'M GOING TO MINCE YOU!
:D
and cause of that one effing dumb joke which failed, your free lunch is GONE!
HAHA. too bad.
get mc la.
i need some movie therapy.
seriously.

cause its starting to sink in.
but i will be fine.

2009-06-02T23:35:00.002+08:00

am i getting to see the light at the end of this tunnel?

hopefully i am!

well, God do answer prayers don't He!
He answered mine! :D

i will continue praying for this to be a happy ending.

(:

i am suddenly motivated to study!
cause i don't want to let you worry anymore.
:D

and, ms janet tan (math lecturer) is from chc too!
she told me to shine for CHC.
BUT
no, i'm going to shine for God!
:D

God, You just so love me don't You.
that You gave me so much more than i deserve.
(:

I WILL HAVE FAITH AND PERSERVERE ON!
:D

GOD BLESS

2009-06-01T23:58:00.002+08:00

was blog hopping and found this statement written by jiaying.

"We just dont want wallow in misery. If giving up something is going to make others happy, then i suppose we feel good about ourselves for making someone else's day"

oh boy oh boy. how true how true.

and jiaying. dont kill me please! HAHA. :D

2009-06-01T23:15:00.002+08:00

interviewing people is so tiring.
omg.

bus-ed home with jiazheng today.
jiazheng is so superbly nice to walk from ngee ann bus stop to sim bus stop just so can take bus with me.
HAHA.
oops. paiseh i fell asleep on the ride home and didnt manage to catch up much with you.
who ask you, go for sat service instead!
but, JIAYOU on laying your foundation with her. :D ^^v
and you will forever be my whining outlet for studies.
HAHA.
:D

and, joshua!
get well soon!
seriously.
of all things, you've gotten yourself an ear infection.
HAHA.
alrighty, as promised i will treat you to lunch after service la!
:D

walked home from the interchange. well. its almost as good as reliving the memories.
HAHA.
but i think i had a revelation.
:D
well, i think only ah.
but it was good. HEH.

and jiazheng. i think what yujie said to you is applying to me too! zzz.

anyw i had a headache from the bus ride home. cause my head was constantly knocking against the "pillar" or smth like that throughout the ride. it was a bumpy ride. just like life.
HAHA.

i feel so tired now. but i can't rest. i have tons of things to do.
GOSH.
why is life so difficult!

i want to stay in church. as in literally make it my house. HAHA. cause there's a sense of calmness and knowing. (:

janice tan! haha. i will find you tmr la. dont so sad. :D

these few days. really really thankful to:
CAILING
ALISON
JEREMIAH
JANICE
:D
you guys rock socks! haha

and today jeremiah got me damn agitated that vanessa had to hold me back.
pfft jere.
but being the magnanimous me, i shall let it go. (:

haha. crap.

i am starting to feel mentally tired.

oh no, not again.
DAMN IT.

ugh. at least God's love is constant.

GOD BLESS! (:

2009-06-01T00:12:00.002+08:00

i have finally managed to calm down a little.

GOSH. was just so freaking worked up just now that i can't think straight.

anyw. today's service was GREAT!
haha. had mini emerge! :D

everyone on stage performing today was under 25, even the worship leaders!
YES! we ARE the next generation!
RISE UP TO TAKE YOUR PLACES PEOPLE! :D

haha. i had soooooooooooo much joy just from praising God today.
the atmosphere was great! :D

the jc/ uni performance for parade of schools was fantastic!
but well done to poly/ ite and the secondary as well!

i think the highlight was the are you smarter than a teenager. apparently the adults won. HAHA. but great job done everyone! :D

pastor said at the count of 3 we are supposed to shout out the names of our sch. and i could hear ben distinctively mumbled ngee ann poly. HAHA. well i didnt shout but i did say ngee ann poly. and thus i know that ngee ann will be touched by the grace of God.

heh. God you are just so wonderful to me aren't You? You gave me such a happy service. :D

haha. after service we lounged ard waiting for ben to finish his meeting for youth camp. me, joshua, seb chu and jared took a photo for free! with monopoly money. T_T haha. but it was rather nice. wanted to wait for ben to take. but by the time ben ended the harvest house fair ended alr. haha.

and, AARON MANAGED TO NOT FORGET THE LYRICS! haha.

hmmm. maybe i shld give it a rest.

to you j,
well maybe we should talk when we've both calmed down.

and on the issue of the other matter.
i shall have faith. just have faith that it will get better. (:

haha. well had much much fun hanging out with seb, joshua and ben.

saw serene and alison at imm. HEH. serene ah. :D

oh well.

i'm tired now. mentally.

till another time.

GOD BLESS US ALL, esp for ct now. :D

2009-05-31T21:58:00.000+08:00

I AM CURRENTLY SO FUCKING PISSED THAT EVERY SINGLE MOLECULE IN ME IS VIBRATING. YES. I AM LITERALLY SHAKING RIGHT NOW.

FUCK YOU BITCH.
SERIOUSLY.

JOSHUA, WELL DONE.
THANKS YOU ARE TRULY A FRIEND.
NO WORRIES I WILL BE GOING FOR A ROUND 2 SOON TO SCREW HER UPSIDE DOWN.

when i've managed to calm down then i'll blog about today's WONDERFUL service.
yup. i enjoyed myself thoroughly. :D

GOD'S MOVEMENT WAS SO STRONGLY FELT! :D

later.
I AM STILL CURRENTLY SHAKING FROM ANGER.

2009-05-30T23:03:00.002+08:00

/edited

ugh. i feel that my appetite is getting smaller.
good thing? no?
i can even go without breakfast and lunch these few days.
prolly cause i've no mood to eat.
HAHA.
crap.

i need to study.
soon.
or i'm fried.

but i'm sure.
life is still good.
ain't it?
no?
heh. whatever.

hope church tmr will renew my soul :D

OH. and i saw a bright red vespa today! super super cute. haha.

THANKS ALEE FOR YOUR COMPANY! (:

decided to edit most of the emo parts away for the past few days cause i believe that things will definitely be better! :D

2009-05-29T21:05:00.003+08:00

HELLO WORLD.

/edited

_________________________________________________________

/edited

anyw.
JANICE TAN! :D
thanks for your compliment eh!
haha. and don't be so shock over what i tell you la!
(:
and, don't think AHEM not in sg then you can... ^^v
lol.
I MISS HAVING PRACTICALS WITH YOU ESPECIALLY!
cause now i have no one to bully! D:

ALISON!
i help you blow your karma away la.
lol.
^^v

i am really sooooooo grateful for cailing and alison these few days. seriously. without you two. i really do not know how to get by the day. HAHA. i love you TATU! lol
:D

i really hope things will soon get better.
and most importantly.
you will feel better. (:

oh crap.

GOD BLESS ALL OF US FOR THE COMMON TESTS! :D

2009-05-28T13:28:00.001+08:00

/edited

damn it. i have math test today and i totally forgot about it.
i wanna do a retest. ugh.

/edited

2009-05-28T09:17:00.001+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RICKY! :D

/edited

haha. having I&E now.
woooo. we are going to sell gelato! :D
HEH.
cool huh.

rawr.
i have nothing to say for now.

till then.
(:

2009-05-27T21:07:00.002+08:00

all will be fine. (:
i just know it will.
right now, i just have to hold on.
and, be strong. (:

Smiling Down - Pillar

You make it so hard on yourself
But theres nobody else
That could ever understand
The feelings that you felt
I could hear you think about
All the time I was around
If you could only see me now
I'm right here looking down

So next time that you feel like crying
Next time you don't feel like trying
Just remember I'll be right there
Smiling down on you
In the morning you don't feel like rising
Next time you feel like compromising
Just remember I'll be right there
Smiling down on you

I know you won't forget
All the time we got to spend
Just because it's been a while
Doesn't mean that its the end
So right here and now
I'll swear you a vow
That I will always be with you
Whenever you feel down
Nothing ever will come between us
Now I'm holding on to the hand of Jesus

So next time that you feel like crying
Next time you don't feel like trying
Just remember I'll be right there
Smiling down on you
In the morning you don't feel like rising
Next time you feel like compromising
Just remember I'll be right there
Smiling down on you

I'll be right there looking down
Even when the shine don't shine
I'll be right there looking down
All along the winter night
I'll be right there looking down
With a smile on me face
I'll be right there with my arms open wide
Right here on Jesus' side

So next time that you feel like crying
Next time you don't feel like trying
Just remember I'll be right there
Smiling down on you
In the morning you don't feel like rising
Next time you feel like compromising
Just remember I'll be right there
Smiling down on you

So next time that you feel like crying
Next time you don't feel like trying
Just remember I'll be right there
Smiling down on you
In the morning you don't feel like rising
Next time you feel like compromising
Just remember I'll be right there
Smiling down on you

i'm tired as well.

but i need to study.
cause i know i need to, but i dont want to.

zzz.

i am emotionally drained. mentally drained.

hur.

stab me please.

and on a lighter note.

WONG YUN JIE! :D
omg. thanks so much for talking to me ytd night. you totally cheered me up! :D
I MISS YOU TRUCKLOADS!
:D
we must meet up soon after you are much less busy with your cca stuff. (:
RENEE <3 YUNJIE! :D

and. i promise you, i heard a loud crack from my back just now. i think i broke my back. HAHA. backaches these few days are killing me.

I AM REALLY TIRED.

GOD BLESS

2009-05-26T22:36:00.004+08:00

/edited

decided that life shld not be spent wallowing in sadness.
:D

2009-05-26T21:37:00.000+08:00

am happy now, well slightly.
why.
cause sherlyn talked to me!
damn its has been such a long time since we talked cuzzie! :D
and she noticed my personal msg on msn thus talked to me.
HAHA.
she noticed my sentence "i am feeling so bloody second class in your eyes"
hoho. well at least someone did notice.
though not the one i want to notice.
but. oh wells.
THANKS CUZ! you just made my night! (cause the day is alr way past, yes no?)
:D

but still.
it doesn't erase the feeling within.

damn.

2009-05-24T21:03:00.001+08:00

This Is Our God - Hillsong
VERSE 1:
Your grace is enough
More than I need
At Your word I will believe
I wait for You
Draw near again
Let Your Spirit make me new

CHORUS:
I will fall at Your feet
I will fall at Your feet
And I will worship You here

VERSE 2:
Your presence in me
[ Hillsong Lyrics are found on www.songlyrics.com ]
Jesus light the way
By the power of Your word
I am restored
I am redeemed
By Your Spirit I am free

BRIDGE:
Freely You gave it all for us
Surrendered Your life upon that cross
Great is the love
Poured out for all
This is our God
Lifted on high from death to life
Forever our God is glorified
Servant and King
Rescued the world
This is our God

woah. deliverance service today. well. expected things happened today, screams, shouts, coughing, vomiting, fainting, crying, laughing. trust me the laughing part was really hilarious. and pastor mike's laughter is so freaking sinister please. haha. pastor wants to challenge the evil spirits and demons! :D heh.

but i didnt shout nor scream nor faint. well i did cry. but not as badly as i did last year. i wonder why. and no no, i didnt control nor shut my heart from the Holy Spirit. D:

when pastor told us to imagine Jesus' bloodied hand reaching forward to you, to comfort you. the image formed in my head made me cry. i was so touched. Praise the Lord. Hallehlujah! :D

i could feel God moving in such great ways and was truly truly touched. was glad that friends made it to the front to surrender themselves. :D heh. i wonder what will happen to me if i went forward as well. lol. but i didnt. so... haha. maybe next time when i get the experience i'll let you guys know. :D

anyw though i didnt have much of a reaction, i had MUCH MUCH joy just praising God! :D

THIS IS TRULY OUR GOD! :D
a God who touches, loves, forgives, saves. :D

heh. happy happy.

but, why must you always tear me down day after day?

and. shit. seeing her kinda makes me blood boil. but i shall be nice after deliverance. haha. blasphemy! haha.
anyw. talked to ben and am happy now. :D
don't know why. but yeah. it just felt like ages since i last spoke to him.
HAHA.

i am definitely returning to chruch again! :D

and. last year the day i return to church after not going for a long period of time, was also deliverance. HAHA.
God just so love me that He wants me to feel relieved, happy and most importantly loved and to show me that He cares. :D

:D

alrights.

GOD BLESS! :D

2009-05-23T22:17:00.003+08:00

These songs encompasses of deep memories.

There Will Be A Day lyrics - Jeremy Camp

I try to hold on to this world with everything I have
But I feel the weight of what it brings, and the hurt that tries to grab
The many trials that seem to never end, His word declares this truth,
that we will enter in this rest with wonders anew

But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings
That there will be a place with no more suffering

(Chorus)
There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more
fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more,
we'll see Jesus face to face
But until that day, we'll hold on to you always

I know the journey seems so long
You feel you’re walking on your own
But there has never been a step
Where you’ve walked out all alone

Troubled soul don’t lose your heart
Cause joy and peace he brings
And the beauty that’s in store
Outweighs the hurt of life’s sting

But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings
That there will be a place with no more suffering

(Chorus)

I can’t wait until that day where the very one I’ve lived for always will
wipe away the sorrow that I’ve faced
To touch the scars that rescued me from a life of shame and misery
this is why this is why I sing

There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more
fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more,
we'll see Jesus face to face

There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more
fears
There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more,
we'll see Jesus face to face

There will be a day, he will wipe away the tears,
He will wipe away the tears,
He will wipe away the tears,
There will be a day.

Hillsong United lyrics - From The Inside Out

A thousand times I've failed
Still your mercy remains
And should I stumble again
Still I'm caught in your grace

Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame
my heart and my soul, Lord I give you control
Consume me from the inside out Lord
Let justice and praise become my embrace
To love You from the inside out

Your will above all else, my purpose remains
The art of losing myself in bringing you praise

Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame
In my heart, in my soul, Lord I give you control
Consume me from the inside out Lord
Let justice and praise become my embrace
To love You from the inside out

Chorus 2x
Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame
And the cry of my heart is to bring You praise

From the inside out Lord, my soul cries out

Captivated - True Worshippers

Jesus You
You hold the world with Your unfailing love
The heaven sings Your praises from above
In Your name lips shall praise and knees shall bow

Father You
The universe exalts in who You are
The stars declare Your wonder far and wide
How majestic is Your love throughout my life

In You.. I find my peace
In You.. I bend my knees

You are Lord of Heaven You shall
Reign in all the earth
I humbly bow before Your majesty
Now I will sing Your praises and I will sing forevermore
I'm captivated by Your love in me

East to West - Casting Crowns

Here I am Lord and I'm drowning 
In your sea of forgetfulness 
The chains of yesterday surround me 
I yearn for peace and rest 
I don't want to end up where you found me 
And it echoes in my mind 
Keeps me awake tonight 

I know you've cast my sins as far 
As the East is from the West 
And I stand before you now 
As though I've never sinned but today 
I feel like I'm just one mistake away 
From you leaving me this way 

Jesus can you show me 
Just how far the East is from the West 
Cause I can't bear to see the man I've been 
Come rising up in me again 
In the arms of your mercy I find rest 
Cause you know just how far the East is from the West 
From one scar[r]ed hand to the other 

I start the day the war begins 
Endless reminding of my sin 
Time and time again 
Your [T]ruth is drowned out by the storm I'm in 
Today I feel like I'm just one mistake away 
From you leaving me this way 

Jesus can you show me 
Just how far the East is from the West 
Cause I can't bear to see the man I've been 
Come rising up in me again 
In the arms of your mercy I find rest 
Cause you know just how far the East is from the West 
From one scar[r]ed hand to the other 

I know you've washed me white 
Turned my darkness into light 
I need your peace to get me through 
To get me through this night 
I can't live by what I feel 
But by the truth your word reveals 
I'm not holding on to you 
But your holding on to me 
Your holding on to me 

Jesus, you know just how far 
The East is from the West 
I don't have to see the man I've been 
Come rising up in me again 
In the arms of your mercy I find rest 
(The arms of your mercy I find rest) 
Cause you know just how far the East is from the West 
From one scar[r]ed hand to the other(x2) 

(Just how far, the East is from the West) (x3) 

From one scarred hand to the other

Who Am I - Casting Crowns

Who am I?
That the Lord of all the earth,
Would care to know my name,
Would care to feel my hurt.
Who am I?
That the bright and morning star,
Would choose to light the way,
For my ever wondering heart.

Not because of who I am.
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done.
But because of who you are.

Chorus:
I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow.
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord you catch me when I'm falling,
And you told me who I am.
I am yours.
I am yours.

Who am I?
That the eyes that see my sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again
Who am I?
That the voice that calm the sea,
Would call out through the rain,
And calm the storm in me.

Not because of who I am.
But because what of youve done.
Not because of what I've done.
But because of who you are.

Chorus:
I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow.
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord you catch me when I'm falling,
And you told me who I am.
I am yours.

Not because of who I am.
But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done.
But because of who you are.

Chorus:
I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow.
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I'm calling,
Lord you catch me when I'm falling,
You told me who I am.
I am yours.
I am yours.

Whom shall I fear?
Whom shall I fear?
'Cuz I am yours.
I am yours.

for you and i know why.

2009-05-23T22:05:00.002+08:00

received an email from leiting which i felt was extremely meaningful.
so here goes.

This is something we should all read at least once a week

Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio

"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me..

It is the most-requested column I've ever written.

My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone...

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret,you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19.. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words'In five years, will this matter?'

27. Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's,we'd grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come.

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

Its estimated 93% won't forward this. If you are one of the 7% who will, forward this with the title '7%'.

I'm in the 7%

Remember that I will always share my spoon with you!

Friends are the family that we choose for ourselves

____________________________

All the world's a stage: And all the men and women merely players.
-William Shakespeare

well. there's a hidden behind. go figure.

HAHA.

i feel damn... sick.
:D

church tmr!
YES!
:D

i shall just leave it all till tmr, for God to heal me. (:

2009-05-21T21:41:00.000+08:00

i'm having a really rough time now and it hurts to put up a front everyday.

it just hurts.

it pains me and it scars me.

i'm sorry.

2009-05-21T09:41:00.000+08:00

i'm tired.
i am really tired.

yeah, i'm not worth it.
you deserve better.
so move on.

it is getting to tiring for me to hold on.
you do not understand at all.

well. no one does anyway.

so, who cares.

right now, i want to fly away.
away from all the pain.
away from all the troubles.

2009-05-20T00:14:00.002+08:00

i realised.

i can only talk about nonsensical stuff and no longer what i truly feel.

i shall stop blogging.

haha.

anyw

GOD BLESS

2009-05-17T22:57:00.000+08:00

i made the decision.

so i got to learn to suck it all up.

life isn't fair
is it?

but at least,
God is fair.

but i have been neglecting Him too.
and i feel bad about it.

i pray i will,
i will might,
and it will be done in time.
(:

for Your glory reigns.

2009-05-17T22:10:00.003+08:00

how agonizing.

well well well.

it has been an agonizing day.
i think too much, too far, too deeply, or do i not?

i've been in a confused state of mind that has left me in a limbo for a really long time.
i'm stumped
lost for words
kinda lost
stuck in a vicious cycle

so, damnit.

why can't a bloody car just knock me down and solve everything for me.
so i can just go up to heaven and meet God.
though i know that it is selfish of me to leave behind the people i care and love and vice versa.
oh, am i still able to go up to heaven?

went for a joy ride alone on the bus to just collect my thoughts, but apparently, mission failed for i am still as f-ed up as ever.

literally ever.

and you, you just have a knack that leaves me wondering what happened. is it wrong for a friend to just ask how have you been. have the 4 years in zh come to naught and ceased to even happened? i really have no idea. i wanted to have a chat and sort out some thoughts cause i know you are someone with great advice. but hell no. out of 5 msg-es usually 3 or more is ignored.

ching. i need to talk. but its kinda difficult considering the fact that you are in melbourne. T_T i miss you a lot a lot!

i just can't seem to think straight.

i do not know anymore.

2009-05-13T23:17:00.004+08:00

i think i have something engineered in me that i have the ability to dismantle someone's head and just walk away.

i feel repulsive of everything.

love is patient, love is kind.

love is from the highest being, God.

joshua harris' book will serve its purpose to me. (:
haha.

i need more quiet time and more prayers.
to calm the raging storm in me.

i need You, just You, Lord.
i need a more Christ-like heart and mind.

maybe, all will come to naught and i will just serve You.

You are the Almighty God.

hmmm.

i know for sure, that the Lord is always here for me despite my sins and my backsliding.

okay, this post is very christian-y.
lol.

but right now, at this point of time.
i realised that only God is the true-est.
and this is a fact i know but failed to acknowledge.

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. (Matthew 11: 28-31)

i know i am not making any sense. cause i dont find any sense in me right now.
i am just rambling on and on and are self contradictory.
paradoxical bullshit (mouse's word, last time, no? haha)
oxymoronic.

yes. I FEEL LIKE A MORON.

to hell with that.
burn you demon, burn!

anyw. today i went to mt zion bookstore and realised. how long have i not felt this feeling called calmness. in there i know that everything will be alright with God's love.

i have felt a wide spectrum of emotions today. but the only constant was from God. the feeling of trust and the knowing of His grace and love was great.

oh crap. i suddenly sound so... HOLY.
and HALLEHLUJAH! to that.

i will always remember that weixiong is forever praying for me! haha.
Amen to that. haha.

maybe its time to hit the sack or smth.

night world.

GOD LOVES and GOD BLESS! :D

2009-05-13T22:01:00.002+08:00

HELLO AGAIN

1 Corinthians 13:1-8a and 13
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails....And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. (NIV)

i am tired.

josiah, i will call you when my head is cleared. don't worry.

2009-05-13T16:17:00.002+08:00

HELLO WORLD. :D

i skipped dr new's tutorial despite his call to remind me about the tutorial. i have my reasons for skipping it.

to you, j (no, joshua its not you, bitch. HAHA :D)

i do not know what i want anymore.

i am tired.

i really am.

tell me, what am i supposed to do?

life is getting boring despite the very very bright side to it.

okay wait, its just today that is bad.

HAHA.

irony irony.

i know i shouldn't be feeling any negativity cause of the BRIGHT BRIGHT thing that happened to me.

but yeah, i can't stop thinking and worrying.

hell to that.

i am rotting and growing mushrooms.

damn you martin, go buy 4D then leave me alone in the shop.

hope you don't win ah.

though you are helping me to install iwork 09

HAHA.

too bad.

alright.

no more mood to type further.

am i going to church this sun?

HAHA.

its a question i can no longer answer.

till then,

GOD BLESS!

esp you, josiah.

the irony of life.

if only Jesus is here on earth physically,

i would like to touch his cloak and be healed.

i need deliverance.

i need prayers.

i need You, Lord.

2009-05-09T22:46:00.002+08:00

was feeling kinda bored just now and was looking for books to read then i chanced upon my secondary school yearbooks.

a wave of nostalgia washed over me while i was flipping through it. the memories of the school, the memories of the teachers, the memories of everyone. it was just like yesterday that we all graduated. and i realise, how much i miss you all. i miss everyone single of you guys. everyone in my class since sec 1, all my teachers though some of you guys may suck. HAHA. irony isn't it. it aint because my lecturers in np are losers of something. but its just that they portray a different feel and image. i will forever remember ms serene ow and her sarcasm, damn it. i miss it still when i fall asleep in lectures. i miss mrs ngiam and her eeeeeeeeeeee6 dont panic first. i miss ms ong and her you'll got listen to me one a not! i miss so much things and i think it will take me such a long time to blog them all out.

to everyone out there, i still think of you guys. seriously. (:

i just want my old life back at times like this.

i miss you, dear friend. though we've stopped communicating, but i still miss you no matter what and hope that we will start talking again. i miss you, i really do.

ah. what's with the sudden gush of emotions.

that's all for now.
i don't want to feel too emotional at this time of the day.
HAHA.

anyw, star trek is nice. catch it if you like. (:

and i've received this email that leiting forwarded and i find that the poem in it is rather interesting and well, touching in a way.

_______________________

SLOW DANCE

Have you ever
watched kids

On a merry-go-round?

Or listened to
the rain

Slapping on the ground?

Ever followed a
butterfly's erratic flight?

Or gazed at the sun into the fading
night?

You better slow down.

Don't dance so
fast

Time is short.

The music won't
last

Do you run through each day

On the
fly?

When you ask How are you?

Do you hear the
reply?

When the day is done

Do you lie in your
bed

With the next hundred chores

Running through
your head?

You'd better slow down

Don't dance so
fast

Time is short.

The music won't
last

Ever told your child,

We'll do it
tomorrow?

And in your haste,

Not see his sorrow?

Ever lost touch,

Let a good
friendship die

Cause you never had time

To call and say,'Hi'

You'd better slow down.

Don't dance
so fast.

Time is short.

The music won't
last

When you run so fast to get somewhere

You
miss half the fun of getting there.

When you worry and hurry
through your day,

It is like an unopened gift...

Thrown away.

Life is not a
race

Do take it slower

Hear the
music

Before the song is over.

________________________

emotions, emotions, emotions. dang it.
GOD BLESS (:

2009-05-09T01:03:00.002+08:00

hello world.

dang it. i am feeling kinda moronic right now.

said too much, cared too much, done too much.
yes, i am feeling pretty redundant and that i have let tons of people down and neglected millions of people. (yes i am exaggerating, so sue me.)
HAHA.

in a pretty sarcastic mood since the morning. so, hell to all the demons. HAHA.

fed my crayfishes today, cleaned up their tank a little.
jeremiah volunteered to do tank A cause he say he missed doing it. he claimed it to be fun. okay, i have to admit, it wasn't half bad. HAHA. but the smell of the food. when i opened the fridge, the moment the whiff of crayfish feed hit my nostrils i almost puked on the spot and fainted. if i am to be in a cartoon, yeah i would turn green and start foaming at my mouth. oh crap.

speaking of cartoons. i miss watching looney toons. i miss bugs bunny, daffy duck etc etc. but not tweety bird. damn tweety man. its dumb ass. HAHA.

i think my change is still not here yet. quoting jeremiah, its stuck in a traffic jam. HAHA. crap. oh God, i really need a change of attitude.

dang it. talking about him ytd was fun man. haha. the sweetness of bitching abt b*. HAHA. i think i am going to switch c* soon thanks to b*. i am unwilling to be under an incompetent leader. haha. maybe maybe. and what's wrong with me having some other form of entertainment? what is just your problem. zzz. get a life. oh i forgot. you sold it to y*. dang you.

anyw, joshua. haha i know you miss me sitting next to you in service and disturbing you right! i bet every week now, you doze off while pastor's talking. HAHA. maybe i will continue to be mia. :D

shit. see. i'm in a crappy mood thus this post is all about ranting. wtf.

i am looking forward to seeing my crayfishes on monday and my cell culture on tues. HAHA. and i have no idea why am i looking forward to see the cells. :D

oh man.

till then,

GOD BLESS! :D

2009-05-07T10:29:00.000+08:00

HELLO WORLD! :D
no no, i'm not dead yet. HAHA.

and school has been... rather unentertaining.

its the routine once again, lectures, tutorials, practicals, the useless I&E.
i seriously miss the pre-FOC days.
the busy-ness, the fun, the love, the joy. HAHA.
i miss the times where we GLs gather in the various places and having fun. (:
i feel as if... everything's over. lol.
in a weird sense of way. D:

well. as usual, I&E has been yet a waste of time. i chiong-ed to sch only to realise that attendance need not taken. T_T next week i promise i'm going to take my time to go for it. RAWR. and out of the four hour slot, we spent one hour talking, one hour on facebook and the other two hours? we left the class. T_T

seriously, my back is aching like mad. in fact today is a problematic day. i am aching ALL OVER. my back and my hip joint. oh my tian.

and the thought of having to see tan sai kang doesn't make it seem any better. T_T rawr. if only i can slap her. HAHA.

i am... utterly bored. haha. bored out of my wits. D:

go, going, gone.

SEE YA PPL! (:

2009-04-24T21:45:00.003+08:00

I LOVE LSCT!
GOOD JOB TO EVERYONE! :D
YOU GUYS ROCK!
we all know that, deep deep deep down! :D

quickened heart beats, breathlessness and just the love of the presence.
oh my God. tell me. what is happening.

rawr.

the love for toys 'r' us! BEWARE OF MY BIG BIRD's PECK! hahaha.
so tell me, how do you exactly feel? cause you are seriously worrying us.
yes, us.

i know you are strong. aren't you? (:
and that you are stalking this space of mine!
HAH!

i am really grateful for your truthfulness.
and your trust in me.
(:
truly i am.
my soulmate, forever. (:

i am proud of you.
truly.
for your care and concern for everyone else.
even at your lowest, you smile for the sake of others.

i thank you for all the through the night talks
the truth
the answers
everything.

(:

say, you really make me feel touched.
HAH!
no, its not meant to be mushy la!
but just how i feel.
(:

and i am really thanking God for your appearance.
though the time has been short,
but you have proven to rock as a friend.
a true friend i should say.
(:

thank You, Lord!
(:

haha. i'm having a mish mash of emotions running through me.
there is so much i want to do,
yet so little time. rawr.

ah. i shall go study now.

GOD BLESS! (:

2009-04-21T22:36:00.000+08:00

JIAYOUS EVERYONE FOR DANCE4FUND! :D

i love LSCT! (:

sometimes, it just gets very tiring to keep trying.

i am very tired of caring.

to you this piece of shit. i am beyond caring. seriously. insignificant piece of shit. ugh.

okay. i am just ranting to no one in particular.

at times like this, i hate human nature. the selfish human nature.

o'Lord. i need to be more Christ-like. i need the strength and energy to carry on. give me Your patience and stamina to keep caring and loving. Amen.

rahhhhh. i wonder. we are having crayfish for aqua prac. then we learn all about fish, isn't it not applicable? HAHA.

anyw, today was fun! :D hahaha. jeremiah chua got punked! :D HAHAHAHAHA.

and next time we shall plan before we watch. haha. :D

GOD BLESS! (: